The Pope's Visit To Britain

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Peter Parka

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Nice to see that while our government is forced to tell everyone that they need to cut back on everything they are willing to splash millions of the taxpayers money so that some cunt in a bullet proof golf buggy can come over here a spew his crap at us. See one of his aides has already got off to a good start by calling the UK a third world country because of the amount of atheists. Ern, no, I think you'll find the third world is largely make up off catholic countries and places with a good concentration of atheists are mainly doing well. Think newsarse summed it up pretty well...




The Third World is where all your followers are dying of AIDS, everyone reminds Vatican

Everyone this morning reminded the Catholic church that the Third World is actually that place where their followers are dying of AIDS because they’ve told them not to use condoms.
Cardinal Walter Kasper referred to the UK as the Third World after mistaking it for sub-Saharan Africa where millions of Catholic Africans are dying needlessly because an eighty year-old Virgin thinks Jesus wants everyone ‘riding bareback’.
As one Catholic explained, “It’s an easy mistake to make. Basingstoke is very reminiscent of Mogadishu, and Watford on a Saturday night is a lot like civil war torn Sudan.”
“To be honest, it was probably wishful thinking on their part, because in the Third World people still listen to what they have to say, whereas here in the UK they are little more than an irrelevant annoyance with an entourage that would make P Diddy blush.”
Third World

Leading Atheist Richard Dawkins has said there is a very easy way to find out if your are in fact in the Third World.
He told reporters, “It’s a simple test, just ask someone what happens if you have sex with a condom. If they start pointing at the sky and screaming about an eternity in a fiery hell, you’re almost certainly in the Catholic influenced third world.”
“You can check to see if their mud hut is adorned with a picture of the Pope looking menacing if you’re still unsure.”
“But If they shrug their shoulders and say ‘no wet patch?’ then you’re probably somewhere near Swindon.”
 
From what I hear, there are going to be embarassingly low turnouts at the Scottish mass. Which is kind of funny in itself.

How much tax payers money are we actually spending on the popes visit? Nobody thought to ask the Vatican to pay for it? What are his Swiss Guard up to?
 
Zorak;1700534[FONT=Arial Black said:
]From what I hear, there are going to be embarassingly low turnouts at the Scottish mass[/FONT]. Which is kind of funny in itself.

How much tax payers money are we actually spending on the popes visit? Nobody thought to ask the Vatican to pay for it? What are his Swiss Guard up to?
Click to expand...

Newsarse did a good article about that too.:24:

Pope adds JLS to bill in order to sell remaining gig tickets

A Vatican spokesperson has announced that boy band JLS have been added as a support act to the Pope’s UK tour in the hope of selling the thousands of unsold £25 tickets.
Sales for the Pontiff’s events have been underwhelming to this point, with today’s discerning consumers expecting more than a lecture by a man in a pointy hat for their £25.
Lapsed Catholic Diedre Williams told us, “I was considering going to see him, but if I really wanted to be told everything in my life is sinful by someone in a dress, I’d have lunch with my mother.”
Another potential Pope fan said, “I went to see U2 last year, and though Bono is a bit of an arsehole, at least he put on a bit of a show for the ticket price. The Pope doesn’t appear to making even the slightest effort.”
“Where are the laser shows, the pyrotechnics? Surely they aren’t expecting me to pay £25 to watch an old man tell me from a lectern that all the gays are evil, are they?”
Pope Visit

A Vatican spokesperson explained that the audience for a JLS gig is almost identical to that expected at this year’s Papal events.
“They’re both entirely delusional, with little more than a tenuous grasp of reality, and remain completely convinced that the person on the stage is some sort of super-being.”
“And with the right persuasion you can easily convince them that condoms are a very bad idea.”
 
Peter Parka said:
Newsarse did a good article about that too.:24:

Pope adds JLS to bill in order to sell remaining gig tickets

A Vatican spokesperson has announced that boy band JLS have been added as a support act to the Pope’s UK tour in the hope of selling the thousands of unsold £25 tickets.
Sales for the Pontiff’s events have been underwhelming to this point, with today’s discerning consumers expecting more than a lecture by a man in a pointy hat for their £25.
Lapsed Catholic Diedre Williams told us, “I was considering going to see him, but if I really wanted to be told everything in my life is sinful by someone in a dress, I’d have lunch with my mother.”
Another potential Pope fan said, “I went to see U2 last year, and though Bono is a bit of an arsehole, at least he put on a bit of a show for the ticket price. The Pope doesn’t appear to making even the slightest effort.”
“Where are the laser shows, the pyrotechnics? Surely they aren’t expecting me to pay £25 to watch an old man tell me from a lectern that all the gays are evil, are they?”
Pope Visit

A Vatican spokesperson explained that the audience for a JLS gig is almost identical to that expected at this year’s Papal events.
“They’re both entirely delusional, with little more than a tenuous grasp of reality, and remain completely convinced that the person on the stage is some sort of super-being.”
“And with the right persuasion you can easily convince them that condoms are a very bad idea.”
Click to expand...

If you were at Radio 1 last week, there were hardly what you would call a load of fans/paparazzi outside, hardly a selling point these days I guess
 
Yep! I agree..if the taxpayer is footing the bill, the taxpayer should decide. The Catholic church is the largest bank in the world and could cough up the cash to cure starvation in africa! yet we have to pay for some narrow minded, bigot to come here and wave a lot..

no thanks. (all due respect to catholics, no offence intended)
 
Strange kind of state visit if that what you really think it is. Most state visits are taken up with meeting the prime minister and the queen to talk important politics, not standing around in half empty churches lecturing on the evils of being gay and condoms.
 
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