The Pope's Visit To Britain

[Peter Parka]

Nice to see that while our government is forced to tell everyone that they need to cut back on everything they are willing to splash millions of the taxpayers money so that some cunt in a bullet proof golf buggy can come over here a spew his crap at us. See one of his aides has already got off to a good start by calling the UK a third world country because of the amount of atheists. Ern, no, I think you'll find the third world is largely make up off catholic countries and places with a good concentration of atheists are mainly doing well. Think newsarse summed it up pretty well...




The Third World is where all your followers are dying of AIDS, everyone reminds Vatican

Everyone this morning reminded the Catholic church that the Third World is actually that place where their followers are dying of AIDS because they’ve told them not to use condoms.
Cardinal Walter Kasper referred to the UK as the Third World after mistaking it for sub-Saharan Africa where millions of Catholic Africans are dying needlessly because an eighty year-old Virgin thinks Jesus wants everyone ‘riding bareback’.
As one Catholic explained, “It’s an easy mistake to make. Basingstoke is very reminiscent of Mogadishu, and Watford on a Saturday night is a lot like civil war torn Sudan.”
“To be honest, it was probably wishful thinking on their part, because in the Third World people still listen to what they have to say, whereas here in the UK they are little more than an irrelevant annoyance with an entourage that would make P Diddy blush.”
Third World

Leading Atheist Richard Dawkins has said there is a very easy way to find out if your are in fact in the Third World.
He told reporters, “It’s a simple test, just ask someone what happens if you have sex with a condom. If they start pointing at the sky and screaming about an eternity in a fiery hell, you’re almost certainly in the Catholic influenced third world.”
“You can check to see if their mud hut is adorned with a picture of the Pope looking menacing if you’re still unsure.”
“But If they shrug their shoulders and say ‘no wet patch?’ then you’re probably somewhere near Swindon.”

 

[Zorak]

From what I hear, there are going to be embarassingly low turnouts at the Scottish mass. Which is kind of funny in itself.

How much tax payers money are we actually spending on the popes visit? Nobody thought to ask the Vatican to pay for it? What are his Swiss Guard up to?

 

[Peter Parka]

]From what I hear, there are going to be embarassingly low turnouts at the Scottish mass[/FONT]. Which is kind of funny in itself.

How much tax payers money are we actually spending on the popes visit? Nobody thought to ask the Vatican to pay for it? What are his Swiss Guard up to?

Newsarse did a good article about that too.:24:

Pope adds JLS to bill in order to sell remaining gig tickets

A Vatican spokesperson has announced that boy band JLS have been added as a support act to the Pope’s UK tour in the hope of selling the thousands of unsold £25 tickets.
Sales for the Pontiff’s events have been underwhelming to this point, with today’s discerning consumers expecting more than a lecture by a man in a pointy hat for their £25.
Lapsed Catholic Diedre Williams told us, “I was considering going to see him, but if I really wanted to be told everything in my life is sinful by someone in a dress, I’d have lunch with my mother.”
Another potential Pope fan said, “I went to see U2 last year, and though Bono is a bit of an arsehole, at least he put on a bit of a show for the ticket price. The Pope doesn’t appear to making even the slightest effort.”
“Where are the laser shows, the pyrotechnics? Surely they aren’t expecting me to pay £25 to watch an old man tell me from a lectern that all the gays are evil, are they?”
Pope Visit

A Vatican spokesperson explained that the audience for a JLS gig is almost identical to that expected at this year’s Papal events.
“They’re both entirely delusional, with little more than a tenuous grasp of reality, and remain completely convinced that the person on the stage is some sort of super-being.”
“And with the right persuasion you can easily convince them that condoms are a very bad idea.”

 

[Tuffdisc]

There are millions of Catholics who won't agree with you

 

[Tuffdisc]

Newsarse did a good article about that too.:24:

Pope adds JLS to bill in order to sell remaining gig tickets

A Vatican spokesperson has announced that boy band JLS have been added as a support act to the Pope’s UK tour in the hope of selling the thousands of unsold £25 tickets.
Sales for the Pontiff’s events have been underwhelming to this point, with today’s discerning consumers expecting more than a lecture by a man in a pointy hat for their £25.
Lapsed Catholic Diedre Williams told us, “I was considering going to see him, but if I really wanted to be told everything in my life is sinful by someone in a dress, I’d have lunch with my mother.”
Another potential Pope fan said, “I went to see U2 last year, and though Bono is a bit of an arsehole, at least he put on a bit of a show for the ticket price. The Pope doesn’t appear to making even the slightest effort.”
“Where are the laser shows, the pyrotechnics? Surely they aren’t expecting me to pay £25 to watch an old man tell me from a lectern that all the gays are evil, are they?”
Pope Visit

A Vatican spokesperson explained that the audience for a JLS gig is almost identical to that expected at this year’s Papal events.
“They’re both entirely delusional, with little more than a tenuous grasp of reality, and remain completely convinced that the person on the stage is some sort of super-being.”
“And with the right persuasion you can easily convince them that condoms are a very bad idea.”

If you were at Radio 1 last week, there were hardly what you would call a load of fans/paparazzi outside, hardly a selling point these days I guess

 

[Abcinthia]

If you were at Radio 1 last week, there were hardly what you would call a load of fans/paparazzi outside, hardly a selling point these days I guess

It's cos they are all at home using their JLS condoms.

 

[Zorak]

There are millions of Catholics who won't agree with you

Well I'm not having sex with kids to win them round.

 

[Dana]

Does anyone else find the Pope going around in a bullet proof golf buggy funny?

 

[Tuffdisc]

Well I'm not having sex with kids to win them round.

Who is asking you to have sex with kids?

 

[Peter Parka]

There are millions of Catholics who won't agree with you

Let them pay for his fucking visit then.

 

[Tuffdisc]

Let them pay for his fucking visit then.

It is a state visit :thumbup

 

[Tuffdisc]

It's cos they are all at home using their JLS condoms.

pmsl, how cheesy huh? JLS of all band promoting "safe" sex :/ Irony

 

[Peter Parka]

Who really gives a fuck if we have good relations with a tiny, kiddy fiddling country or not?

 

[Tuffdisc]

Who really gives a fuck if we have good relations with a tiny, kiddy fiddling country or not?

As much as atheists and agnostic people have sex with children I guess :24:

 

[porterjack]

send him packing

would not be the first time that GB has resisited an abusive German Tyrant, hell bent on spreading lies and propaganda

 

[Carlton]

It is a state visit :thumbup

well get the members of the state to pay for his visit that actually want the visit..
should raise about a fiver I reckon.

 

[Tuffdisc]

well get the members of the state to pay for his visit that actually want the visit..
should raise about a fiver I reckon.

Pfft, I guess we should do that to everyone who visits here on a state visit then

 

[Carlton]

Yep! I agree..if the taxpayer is footing the bill, the taxpayer should decide. The Catholic church is the largest bank in the world and could cough up the cash to cure starvation in africa! yet we have to pay for some narrow minded, bigot to come here and wave a lot..

no thanks. (all due respect to catholics, no offence intended)

 

[Peter Parka]

Strange kind of state visit if that what you really think it is. Most state visits are taken up with meeting the prime minister and the queen to talk important politics, not standing around in half empty churches lecturing on the evils of being gay and condoms.

 

[Tuffdisc]

Strange kind of state visit if that what you really think it is. Most state visits are taken up with meeting the prime minister and the queen to talk important politics, not standing around in half empty churches lecturing on the evils of being gay and condoms.

Everyone has the right to an opinion, whether you like it or not