Is it fair to arbitrarily increase punishment to your child?
- Thread starter Greatest I am
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Greatest I am
Active Member
You could not find the lie could you so you got angry and went for the big letters.
LOL.
You are pathetic.
Regards
DL
Convoluted rubbish again
Actually he fucked up first.
We're done because you say we're done or because you realize your analogy is stupid?
You have a problem with the premise of your thread... the key word is arbitrarily.
That's the definition of arbitrarily. In the case of the son that asks his dad not to be mad at him and the dad says he won't, then he finds out the extent of his son's transgressions and he's angry about it. There isn't anything arbitrary in that situation, it isn't by chance, whim, or impulse. It is out of necessity, reason, or principle. Therefore the actions of the dad in this situation are the opposite of arbitrary. Should he have told his son that he wouldn't be mad? Probably not. But at the same time, the son knew his dad would be angry and therefore tried to manipulate the situation by asking him for clemency when he knew he wouldn't get any.
Greatest I am
Active Member
Probably not says it all. Who suckered who and who had to back track on his word and who made the other suffer because of the sucker parent.
The fathers response would be like---you suckered me so I will have my way with you for revenge for making me make myself look stupid.
Might makes right in other words.
Regards
DL
Greatest I am
Active Member
He did not screw up first.
He just outthought you first and that is what got you mad.
No one likes to make himself look the fool.
Regards
DL
No. The scenario states that he did something illegal, dangerous and against the rules
I believe that's what would get me mad, not the implication that he "outthought" me"
Not the case at all. I like this definition of " come clean ".
" come clean to confess or tell the truth about something (informal) "
It's at the very bottom of this page. I didn't write it or it would be at the top.
Link: http://encarta.msn.com/dictionary_1861597701/clean.html
The way I read your initial statement is that you bs'd your kids until they were old enough to know you were doing it. It was when they confronted you that you decided to " come clean " and tell 'em the truth.
Your honor.... the defense rests.
Minor Axis
Well-Known Member
As a rule, before the word "lie" gets bandied about in emotional religious threads, you (in general) should think really hard about if a statement is someone's opinion or are they purposely spreading what they know to be false information. This applies in multiple directions.
Um........ I know you said " in general " but if you are pointing that statement at me " in general " I want to make it very clear I only responded to a statement he wrote and how I understood it. If I understood it wrong, and I may have like I said before then it's up to him to enlighten me as to exactly what he meant.... religious thread or not.
I also want to make it perfectly clear that I understand this is a debate section and not an argument section. I wish others would see it that way as well. There is a difference between the two.
Disclaimer.... the last paragraph is made " in general " and not directed at individual.
Greatest I am
Active Member
I would discuss what you say is my lie but you have yet to show what you think is the lie I told.
Show it or-----
Regards
DL
Show it or-----
Regards
DL
You skirted the issue which was your two statements that I pointed out to you.... again. You also avoided my post with reference to my interpretation of " coming clean" which I would like to remind you.... again... were your words and not mine. That said, it's pretty hard to point out anything specific when you were being as vague as you always are.
imo opinion a lot of this could be avoided DL if you would treat people with a bit more respect in your threads / posts by answering questions or statements when they are directed at you instead of talking down to people and doing a little jig to avoid rebuttal. Your snide answers don't really accomplish much in a discussion forum.
Greatest I am
Active Member
So now it was only a vague statement and yet coming clean does not mean taking the vagueness out of it and means I lied. Ya.
Thanks for ---coming clean--- with your initial statement.
Regards
DL
Another comment... saying you won't be mad and then punishing the child anyway doesn't account for an "arbitrary increase". Even if I didn't get mad in the example, there would still have to be consequences for their actions.
Greatest I am
Active Member
Sure and the first consequence is breaking your word as the child does not expect consequences from one who is not angry. That is why he suckered you in the first place. Did he care if you were angry or not. No. He cared about not being punished and you knew that from the get go.
Bob and weave.
Admitting that you are wrong, is one of the hardest self imposed consequence that a man can impose on himself. Without doing so, he will never get to where he mentally wants to be.
Regards
DL
That's where you are wrong. I can punish my son without being angry with him. If he does something wrong that demands a punishment, then I take appropriate measures. It wouldn't be my fault if he chose to take my saying I wouldn't be mad as me saying that he wouldn't be punished. Those are two entirely separate things. I'm capable of being disappointed in my son's actions without being angry. Therefore your entire premise is a logical fallacy. Because you can punish without anger. There is no arbitrary decision, no unfair escalation, or anything of the sort.
Minor Axis
Well-Known Member
I want to discuss the example (some more) of warning your child of being put on restriction for a day if he does not listen to you, but when he does not listen again, you put him on restriction for 30 days and spank him too. Your child my respect what you can do to him, but will he respect you?
''A Parent's Influence
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."(the Bible)
You may have read the following poem, but it is well worth reading again:
I took a piece of plastic clay
And idly fashioned it one day;
And as my fingers pressed it still,
It moved and yielded as my will.
I came again when days were past,
The form I gave it still it bore,
And as my fingers pressed it still,
I could change that form no more.
I took a piece of living clay,
And gently formed it day by day,
And molded with my power and art
A young child's soft and yielding heart.
I came again when days were gone;
It was a man I looked upon,
He still that early impress bore,
And I could change it never more.(unknown)''
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."(the Bible)
You may have read the following poem, but it is well worth reading again:
I took a piece of plastic clay
And idly fashioned it one day;
And as my fingers pressed it still,
It moved and yielded as my will.
I came again when days were past,
The form I gave it still it bore,
And as my fingers pressed it still,
I could change that form no more.
I took a piece of living clay,
And gently formed it day by day,
And molded with my power and art
A young child's soft and yielding heart.
I came again when days were gone;
It was a man I looked upon,
He still that early impress bore,
And I could change it never more.(unknown)''
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