Guys vs Girls, the insult thread...

[BadBoy]

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

She starts her sentence with "A man once told me..."

 

[Niamh]

[FONT=Times New Roman, Times, serif]He said . . . Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . . I would but you're never there.[/FONT]

 

[BadBoy]

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by up to 90%.

It's called wedding cake.

 

[Niamh]

[FONT=Times New Roman, Times, serif]What do men and sperm have in common?
They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.[/FONT]

 

[BadBoy]

wned:

I'm not gonna lie, that was good.

 

[Niamh]

wned:

I'm not gonna lie, that was good.

..

 

[porterjack]

why two breasts?

a. to encourage threesomes with her sister

b. guys always have a best buddy

c. why not

 

[Niamh]

Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism

 

[itsmeJonB]

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you done told her twice.

What do you call a woman with one black eye?


A quick learner

 

[CityGirl]

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

 

[NoDak]

Man One: "I lost 175 pounds of ugly fat last week."

Man Two: "How'd you do that?"

Man One: " I was granted a divorce."


I got a lawnmower for my wife. I thought it was a very fair trade! (Bah-dum-tsshhhh!)

 

[purpledove]

What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called?

The man.

 

[CityGirl]

What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand?
A man's undivided attention.

 

[CityGirl]

Did you guys give up or what?

 

[USF Sam]

[FONT=Times New Roman, Times, serif]What do men and sperm have in common?
They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.[/FONT]

Yeah... we lost with this shot. :24:

 

[Skorpy]

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

 

[CityGirl]

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.

 

[Guyzerr]

I took my wife to a wife swapping party last night and got 2 chickens, a goose and a duck.

 

[Keight]

Men are like… Handguns.
Keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

 

[Codrus]

this is terrible....please continue