Very. Pissed. Off.

[andcuriouser]

I'm going to refer to these people by name. Matt, obviously, my husband. And Eliza. His lovely (sarcasm) ex-wife.

This afternoon I had to run some errands, so I asked Matt to just drop me off on Hespeler Road and pick me up in an hour and a half, to which he agreed. Matt didn't have his cell phone on him, because I'd caught him outside coming back from a bikeride, and we just left. So we agreed that I would be at BMO in an hour and a half and then he would pick me up there.

So I do my errands, and an hour and a half later, I wait at BMO. It's also fucking cold out. After fifteen minutes, I try his cell, but it's busy. So I try it again, and it gets his voicemail. I go inside BMO and this really nice teller let me hang out in the chairs and she even dug out some real magazines from her bag so that I didn't have to amuse myself by reading investment pamphlets. AN HOUR LATER, Matt finally pulls up, and who is in the front seat? His ex-fucking-wife.

Apparently, Eliza came to a four-way stop earlier, is unable to drive, and tried to make a left turn when it was the car going straight who had the right of way. There was a collision, and the roads are slippery from the new snow, and her car spun and to make a long story short: she totaled her car. She herself is fine, but her car is done.

So she called my husband, boohooing about her car and asking to come get picked up. She has a boyfriend, who's car is apparently in the garage and so he couldn't pick her up (I don't actually buy that, but okay). Matt the Hero went and picked her up, and then took her out to lunch at Country Boy (which is in Kitchener, a good twenty minutes from where I was at the time) while I was waiting for him to pick me up.

He explains this to me in the car en route to our house, so it's not like I could complain while Eliza was right there. This chick has totalled THREE CARS IN FIVE YEARS. That's not even counting this one. Someone should honestly take her license away or something. That's just inexcusable.

To make matters worse, we get home and Eliza is still pretending to be all upset (I say pretending, because you'd think a normal person, which Eliza is not, would be like, "well thank you for picking me up and for lunch, but you should take me home now", but no). So Matt invites her inside to calm down with tea without even consulting me or thinking, "Hey, this is actually a recipe for conflict, considering this is my ex-wife and also the man I left her for!"

I end up sitting in the living room with them for about ten minutes, and Matthew is getting annoyed with me for being annoyed with him, so when I get up to go to the bathroom, he excuses himself and follows me in. And then pins me to the wall and does the whole serious-talk-"look at me when I'm talking to you"-thing. Which basically came down to: I'm being an unsympathetic bitch about this whole thing, and I should feel bad for her because she just totaled her car, and I need to stop being such a cock and think about other people for a change, and if I don't like it, I should just go hang out in the bedroom by myself.

So guess what? I'm in the bedroom by myself. How nice.

 

[OUZBnd]

Don't make the worst out of the situation. He was helping someone out who he dedicated a lot of his life to and obviously had cared for. It was ONE HOUR out of your life that you had to wait for him while he was doing a good deed. IMO, don't make it worse than it already is.

 

[Bagel]

bah..its ad she wrecked her car butliek yous iad thats to many cars to quick hard to be sympathetic when its her fault she wrecked the damn thing

 

[AUDRAA]

heres the deal though, she will try to milk this for all its worth and poor Le will get the short end of the deal

 

[Charmer]

I agree with Bagel and especially pony girl. It's almost like she fucks up on purpose knowing Matt will bail her out. Or else she has a serious chemical imbalance or depth perception when driving cars.........

Too much trying to keep the past as her present and not getting on with her life. I wonder what she's thinking inside when she's sitting there inside your place.

 

[Kat]

Le Im sooo sorry you have to deal with this...I know how much it sucks to have to deal with an ex...though thankfully (sorry hun) not to this extent *hugs*

matt= not very nice for making le wait

luv ya anyways though

 

[elluko]

Thank god for magazines!

 

[Tim]

I have one question for you Le, when he picked you up, did you ride in the front seat next to your husband or did she continue to sit there while you sat in the back?

 

[andcuriouser]

I have one question for you Le, when he picked you up, did you ride in the front seat next to your husband or did she continue to sit there while you sat in the back?

She rode shotgun.

It's been four years and five months since their divorce. You'd think it's time to cut the cord. It's not so much that they still talk, that isn't what bothers me. It's just that when she's around, I guess Matt feels like he owes her something, so I start getting treated like the Other Person again.

 

[BreakfastSurreal]

maybe it is time to totally cut ties then? It's not fair to you to be put in the backseat, literally and figuratively, whenever she is around because matt feels guilty about cheating on her and leaving her for you. That was HIS decision. HE needs to stand by it...she is obviously trying to yank some sympathy strings here, and it's working..and as long as it keeps working, she's going to keep doing it. If my boyfriend did that to me....ohhhh heeelllllllll noooo....there would CERTAINLY be hell to pay. NO doubt about it.

 

[hhayes]

sorry to hear that Le. Did he at least apologize to you?

 

[Tim]

She rode shotgun.

It's been four years and five months since their divorce. You'd think it's time to cut the cord. It's not so much that they still talk, that isn't what bothers me. It's just that when she's around, I guess Matt feels like he owes her something, so I start getting treated like the Other Person again.

Breakfast was right, he is putting you in the "Back seat" in your relationship. This is why I asked you that question. Your husband may not put her in her place, but you need to stand up and show her that her place is "Behind" you. When he came to pick you up, or anytime the three of you are in the car, she should get the "Third" seat.

As it should have played out;
He arrives to pick you up, you see that she is in the front seat. When he stops the car you open her door and kick her to the back. She doesn't move at first and gives you a confused look, then as she realizes what you are getting at, her confused look turns into a dirty look. And if she still doesn't move, you tell that bitch that this is YOUR husband not hers and her place is in the back seat.

Le, YOU need to let her know her place... That's behind you and she better get used to it if she wants to stay around.

 

[BreakfastSurreal]

i agree with tim. I think it is your job next time to let her know her place. It puts matt in a weird position to tell her that, but if you tell her he should back you up if she tries giving any lip.

 

[Kat]

Breakfast was right, he is putting you in the "Back seat" in your relationship. This is why I asked you that question. Your husband may not put her in her place, but you need to stand up and show her that her place is "Behind" you. When he came to pick you up, or anytime the three of you are in the car, she should get the "Third" seat.

As it should have played out;
He arrives to pick you up, you see that she is in the front seat. When he stops the car you open her door and kick her to the back. She doesn't move at first and gives you a confused look, then as she realizes what you are getting at, her confused look turns into a dirty look. And if she still doesn't move, you tell that bitch that this is YOUR husband not hers and her place is in the back seat.

Le, YOU need to let her know her place... That's behind you and she better get used to it if she wants to stay around.

I agree with tim on this le. It may be awkard...and yeah maybe it'll make matt mad...but it is your right...He made the choice to leave her...also he wanted to get married too...It is the way you are now...screw her...he needs to start putting you first...There is absolutly nothing in the world that should put you in the backseat.

Shit even when i went out with Bo and his friend before...his friend had really long legs so I offered to sit in back and let him have the front...Bo was like NO WAY! He can deal with the back you belong up front next to me. As it should be hun.

Matt needs to figure out who is more important...if he wants to live in the past...or move forward with his future...and quit making you be the one to give on this...making you wait was inexcusable....making you sit in back to her and have to deal with her without asking you if you minded was downright disrespectful...you are a team now in full...time for him to act like it

 

[Mrs Behavin]

You come 1st Le! Not her! She had her chance and apparently blew it. Too late for her now!

 

[Veronica]

i say, kick her ass

 

[alleycat]

She rode shotgun.

ok dude...when i read this my fuckin jaw dropped.
holy crap leland. i cant even read the rest of this post yet without posting up how fuckin bullshit this is. im sorry matt but that was totally disrespectful to leland. not only did you turn your back on him for her to give her a ride, you made him 2nd place. you could have picked leland up, and brought him home or to lunch with you guys. i cant believe how deeply hurt leland is right now. i think most of us know how sensitive leland is, how much he has been hurt, and how much he cares about you. the intentions were nice, but the priorities matt had were completely and utterly wacked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im sorry. i love you leland. this was completely out of line in my opinion.

im going to start on the second page now. i dont think i am done bitching yet.

nope...not done yet.....
leland... you are owed an apology. you are also owed some respect. that was totally completely disrespectful.
matt... listen to what we say here and move on from her. she is one of those people that will take advantage of kind people and use them for all they are worth. leland loves you more than i have ever seen anyone love another. dont take that for granted ever!!!!!!
ex-wife.... you suck!!! you lost years ago. move on.

 

[bass_man1989]

I'm suddenly not so pissed off about my computer being bugged out. But that doesn't help you does it.

 

[Under-Ground]

Don't make the worst out of the situation. He was helping someone out who he dedicated a lot of his life to and obviously had cared for. It was ONE HOUR out of your life that you had to wait for him while he was doing a good deed. IMO, don't make it worse than it already is.

LOL, I dont know I think I would be just a pissed!

 

[OUZBnd]

I'd be pissed, but i don't think I would have let it ruin my day. I guess we are just different people. I try not to stress about the little things, but then again maybe to le this wasnt a little thing? Anyway, sorry this is causing you so much frustration Le.