Really? Seriously?

[Tangerine]

Fair enough that times change...

you did not ride 3000 miles away for the most part, to tell someone a person died and come back home right away.

Nope. You wrote a letter and someone carried it across the country and delivered it by hand.

In effect, a text message. Just not as fast.

 

[Natasha]

Don't you think it's a quite different scenario though, when you are talking about law enforcement notifying next of kin about a death as opposed to a family member communicating to another?

No, I don't. The only reason law enforcement has to do it is b/c the family members are in another state and don't want to deliver the news by phone (or there's no family member local to do the notification). I would agree that in a scenario where law enforcement is making the initial notification (i.e. a fatal traffic accident where nobody is yet aware of the death), that is different.

I know that I personally would've much rather found out my brother's bestfriend was dead face to face than over the phone. But we don't get to pick how things happen in life.

 

[Joe the meek]

And my point was that for some people it may already BE acceptable. Who is to determine what is acceptable and is not?

The only advantage I see for texting is for business or retaining information.

I determine what is acceptable because if someone text's me for a "social reason" I call them to inform them NOT to do it again.

Hey, then again, my wife still sends out Christmas letters. Funny enough last year we were busy with stuff around the house and she didn't get any out. Got a bunch of phone calls from people asking us why we didn't send any out LOL Come to think of it, we also have our son take time to write thank you cards to people for gifts for his birthday and holidays.

 

[Panacea]

As Tangerine already said, it's context dependent. This was completely unacceptable for Darrell; a point which I think we all respect and understand. It's frustrating when people don't have any respect for our boundaries and our feelings.

That being said, others may not mind so much...I guess we're in that 'in between' time technologically, where social etiquette isn't perfectly clear. Some people don't like getting texts at all, some people cannot stand being called and say "um hello, just text me!!!".

I don't really know how I would feel. I have physically distant relatives in NC and if I got a text saying one passed away, I wouldn't mind...now I'd think we would need to talk further to plan for the funeral, so I'd be like...um is that all you have to say?

 

[rback33]

I got the call from my dad last January of my Grandpa's passing. I was in North Dakota on my annual excursion to Minot working a farm show. There was no way for anyone to let me know face to face. Even if I had been at home, he would have called me. His passing was not unexpected and all funeral arrangements had been made months in advance. My colleagues at the show thought I should get on the first flight home. He passed on Wednesday and the funeral was not until Monday. I was supposed to fly home on Friday anyway and most of my family was not getting in until Saturday. I saw no reason to waste my bosses money by ditching the show and flying home early.... when there was nothing to fly home for... I worked the rest of the show and got to spend a great weekend with my family celebrating his life.

 

[dancingpotato]

You do what is right at the time and for that person.