My girl's sex drive is opposite of mine.

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alice in chains

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Honestly I donnot see how sex can be more important than the emotion of love. Love goes so far beyond sex, especially if you actually live together and are together. It can be difficult to not look far into the future, but you will see that sex isn't the most important thing in a relationship if it's one that will last. And if you're willing to give it a fair chance, then maybe it will come back. Could be just a phase.
 
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HK

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Honestly I donnot see how sex can be more important than the emotion of love. Love goes so far beyond sex, especially if you actually live together and are together.


See now, I agree that love goes beyond sex, but I also think it's important to recognise how important sex is to a healthy relationship, or rather, being in agreement about how important sex is.

It's not going to be the same for every couple - some can be happy with once a week, some wouldn't be happy with less than once a day. If you can adjust to suit your partner or vice versa then great, but if one of you is miserable because of the lack or frequency of the sex you're having then just 'being in love' won't fix that.
 

Thornless

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I just thought of something, maybe her vagina was getting raw/sore, and she didn't feel comfortable telling you

Happens to me now and then.
 

Boomer

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I just thought of something, maybe her vagina was getting raw/sore, and she didn't feel comfortable telling you

Happens to me now and then.

She told me that she does get sore. That I'm "Not exactly small." <----But I don't buy it. :p
 

NoDak

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She told me that she does get sore. That I'm "Not exactly small." <----But I don't buy it. :p

There you have it. Since you can't connect to her nervous system and feel what she physically feels, maybe you should LISTEN to her! If you love someone, truly, you will put your personal desires aside for their good. I bet, after having a corncob shoved up your ass, you'd just beg for more, wouldn't you? If she says she's sore, then, she's sore. Leave sex alone for a few days and give her a chance to heal up. Look into lubricants that might make the experience better for her.
You say you love her, but, the responses you've given just sound like you're more worried about gettin' some than what's good for her, as well as you.
 

Natasha

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You say you love her, but, the responses you've given just sound like you're more worried about gettin' some than what's good for her, as well as you.

I think that's an unfair statement. I don't get that vibe at all.
 

NoDak

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I think that's an unfair statement. I don't get that vibe at all.

Maybe, and if so, I'm sorry, but, he mentioned that she had told him she was some sore. "I'm not buying it", I believe were his words. There's where I gathered some insensitivity to her needs.
 

Natasha

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NoDak said:
Maybe, and if so, I'm sorry, but, he mentioned that she had told him she was some sore. "I'm not buying it", I believe were his words. There's where I gathered some insensitivity to her needs.

The "I'm not buying it" was in reference to her comment about his size...or that's how I took it, at least. Only Boomer can say for sure. ;)
 

Boomer

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Take a look at one of the online tests. There is nothing definitive but it will tell you if there is an indicator of having ADD
She's a psycology major so we looked it up in the dsm and went over it. She doesnt think I have it. She said, when I need to focus I do and I can sit still. For instance watching a movie doesnt drive me bonkers.
Lots of decent advice given to you, Boomer.

Here's something I might try.... Do you two have a set bed time? Why not suggest going to bed an hour earlier. That way.... if she is tired by bed time.... this will give you more time to have sex..... (and I do hope you are making love to her and not just yanno.... fucking her).

Or.... set the alarm to get up earlier and do 'it'.

No I'm not just fucking her. I love her to pieces. Seriously I'm probably going to marry her.
 

Staci

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keep talking to her. if you love her like you say you do then you can handle this. and just fyi, 3 times a week is a good thing LOL
 

NoDak

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I came down on you a bit hard and I apologize. It sounds like you and your lady are talking about it. Good for you. I wish you both the best in your relationship.
 

CityGirl

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She's a psycology major so we looked it up in the dsm and went over it. She doesnt think I have it. She said, when I need to focus I do and I can sit still. For instance watching a movie doesnt drive me bonkers.
As a psychologist, my mother takes issue with the fact that all attention deficit disorders are classified under Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder in the DSM IV and so many people have the components of attention deficit disorder without the hyperactivity. Look under ADHD in the DSM and you will see the inattentive type, hyperactive type and combination type. There also is a classification of hyperfocused attention disorder. Many adults are undiagnosed and over time, since childhood, have develped compensatory mechanisms. Diagnosis of ADD in adults takes symptomology from childhood...things like forgetting homework, misplacing things etc. My mom, as a professional thinks some online tests can be good tools for those who wonder if they have a form of ADD. Here is a link to a fairly thorough test (for the internet). It does ask for your email prior to giving results but gives your results on the site instead of via email. http://www.oneaddplace.com/add-test.php
 

Niyi Briggs

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To give a realistic advice, it is better to leave if the sex drive doesn't align. You can't be having a very high libido and plan to settle with a lady with an average libido. There would necessarily be problems with that arrangement.
 
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