My girl's sex drive is opposite of mine.

[Alien Allen]

Hey Boomer you just got schooled by the girlfriend as to what married life is like.

Consider yourself lucky as you got the lesson before rather than after

 

[Joe the meek]

Hey guys! I know its been a long time, but when I'm in a spot I always know I can come to the OTz and get a straight answer. SO! Off we go!

I've been dating Krystin for about 5 months now and I love her to pieces. Matter of fact, popping the question is indeed in the future. When we first got together we were all over each other. Not a night would go by that we didn't make love. Which blew my mind. I had yet to meet a woman who could match my drive in the sack. Well that seems to have changed. Sex has slowed down alot. Like....alot. She said it was like that in the begining because we had just met and she hadnt had sex in a while, but that her drive will never get that high again. This bothers me. I may have a problem, but I want her all the time. She is always passing out in bed. Saying she's tired or generally just not in the mood. I feel rejected. Unattractive, hurt and frustrated. I've been trying to kick the frustration, but I just cant. This has me in a bad place. I feel like she may not actually be the one. What do you guys think?

The key question to all of this is what happens when you pull a dutch oven on her?

 

[HK]

I'd be interested to know how much it's gone down to.

Also, maybe try pouncing on her at different times. I know that for me, when I actually get into bed is a really stupid time to try and get amorous because most of the time, I'm going to bed because I have work the next day and I'm tired. I'd rather be confronted with an erection when I'm not thinking about how long this is going to take so I can still get some sleep, and if she's always telling you she's tired then that could be her problem too.

Try grabbing her at different times of the day, see if that helps

 

[Pumpkin]

Whilst sex shouldn't be the ONLY element of a relationship it is a very important. If you are 5 months in and are already sexually frustrated and feeling unattractive and rejected, in my opinion it is not a very good sign, to me these are issues that a couple who has been together for a LONG time have to deal with.

As good as all of the advice here is, the best way to sort through the issue and find out what is going on is to talk to your girlfriend, even though it might be difficult.

 

[Keight]

I agree with what Mystic said..... its only been 5 months. I honestly beleive if you are with the person you are supposed to be sex is easy, often and not at all akward. If its making you feel insecure dude you should mention something to her you cant truely enjoy the relationship if you are concerned about something that important.

 

[banned]

There is a SEXPERIMENT in a church at the moment.Doing it 7 days straight.Maybe you and her should join a church ...Ha !!!!

 

[Boomer]

Maybe you want to focus your attentions on other things besides sex. If the whole relationship is founded on bedroom antics, it ain't much to begin with. Do you, two, just like being together? I mean, with clothes on, doing something together, hanging out together, things that don't include sex. If every activity you do with her is expected to end up with your clothes on the floor, she might just be getting tired of being 'used'. Maybe she needs to be reassured that you're sticking with her for all reasons, not just for getting your rocks off. Hell! You can do that by hand, for gosh sakes!
What I'm trying to say is: Re examine your motives for being with her. If it always comes down to sex, walk away. Women want more than to lie on their backs all the time. They want to be loved and cared for because you love and care for them.

Yeah, we are always together. We still cuddle, hold hands, talk about everything under the moon. I still do the same cheesy romantic stuff I've always done. Bring her flowers on a date. Random gifts. Writing letters back and forth and whatnot. Every aspect of our relationship is good. This is the only pothole I'm hitting. So no, she is not just an object to me and is no way treated as such. I love, respect and treat her like a lady. The sex every night in the begining wasnt just my call. Its not like I was raping her. lol

nodak took the words out of my mouth. have you also tried talking to her to see if something else is going on in her life? some women, when stressed or worried, can lose their sex drive

We talked about it last night and she assured me that it wasnt anything I'm doing. That she's stressed and tired due to work, school and some financial situations we're going through. I guess us guys are wired different. The room could be on fire and I'm still down. XD

I have a freakishly high drive but once a night every night is a lot, even when you first meet. I can see how it might seem like "too much" for someone. What has it dwindled down to? At least once a week? Or less than that?

We went from every night to about 3 times a week.

Sorry, but it sounds as though your in lust, not love. Love is much more than just sex all the time.

Nope, I'm pretty sure I'm in love. But when your partner is all over you one minute and then giving you the cold shoulder the next, you're a fool if you dont think something is up.

 

[banned]

I would not be worried with 3 times a week...if you love each other all will be fine.
The more presure you guys put on yourself the worst it gets.
3 times a week is not the end of the world.Think you shoot the gun with your worries.

 

[rback33]

3 times a week is A OK... you are in a good place. Don't stress it!

 

[CityGirl]

3x a week?!

 

[Natasha]

I guess us guys are wired different. The room could be on fire and I'm still down. XD

Fuck...I *am* a guy!!! :24:

 

[skyblue]

yo booms me old mate

if you do indeed love this girl sex isn't the be all and end all,you say about her being tired,does she work long hours etc...you need to ask yourself these sort of questions....and 3 times a week is far from being a disaster

 

[Alien Allen]

The room could be on fire and I'm still down. XD


We went from every night to about 3 times a week.

By any chance do you have ADD?

I am not being flippant

That is one of the things that go with that. Many with ADD have big sex drives.

 

[Haus]

shit 3 times a week. we should all be so lucky haha

 

[CityGirl]

We went from every night to about 3 times a week.
.

You aren't hungry much! http://www.offtopicz.net/showthread...-to-Consider&p=2080079&viewfull=1#post2080079 See number 8 :24:

 

[jassilem]

You aren't hungry much! http://www.offtopicz.net/showthread...-to-Consider&p=2080079&viewfull=1#post2080079 See number 8 :24:

Holy shit.. I nearly spit soda everywhere.............. :24:

 

[Boomer]

Thanks for the input everyone. I really appreciate it.

 

[Boomer]

Honestly I've always thought I've had it, but have not been diagnosed Allen.

 

[RedRyder]

Lots of decent advice given to you, Boomer.

Here's something I might try.... Do you two have a set bed time? Why not suggest going to bed an hour earlier. That way.... if she is tired by bed time.... this will give you more time to have sex..... (and I do hope you are making love to her and not just yanno.... fucking her).

Or.... set the alarm to get up earlier and do 'it'.

 

[Alien Allen]

Honestly I've always thought I've had it, but have not been diagnosed Allen.

Take a look at one of the online tests. There is nothing definitive but it will tell you if there is an indicator of having ADD