What did Adam lie to God about?
He lied about not eating the juicy fruit. Because he couldn't resist Eve's exotic delicacy. Yes, Eve tempted Adam from the straight and narrow and made him do it....and he enjoyed the eating...and Eve enjoyed the giving so they made merry.
Now after the feast Adam doth remember what God hath said about not partaking in such things and he verily felt guilty but he already had his eating and was satisfied albeit it was a temporary satisfaction and he was prepared to eat more if given the chance because Eve was very tempting.
Buuuuut......Adam didn't realise God knoweth and seeeth all things and when Adam and Eve was doing the naughty God was verily peeping. :nod: yes sireeee. God pretended he didn't knoweth or seeeth cause he's tricky like dat. So he asked Adam the trick question. "Adam, I ask unto thee....did you do the naughty?"........"and why is Eve not wearing that leaf I gave her?" Adam played dumb and in order to avoid answering the question answered the question with a question. (you know, like how some peeps do on the forum
when they don't want to answer).
Adam: God, why dost thou asketh me this question. Don't you trust me?
God *bellowing voice*: Adam, answer the bloody question....or else you will feel my wrath. I am not in a good mood.
Adam: but...but.....
(Adam panicked)
.........No sir, I didn't do nothing. I didn't eat no fruit of the loom. It was Eve.
God: Adam, you snake in the grass, you egg sucking dog.....I know you did it. I knows and sees everything. I am that I am.
Eve: It was him, he made me give it to him. Goddammit, he's lying God. And he tooketh away my leaf too.
God: Fess up Adam. Fess up now.
Adam: Ok ok, I confess. I did eat the forbidden fruit. But she made me do it. That Eve.
And so it came to pass Adam got caught in a lie by the old fox and the first sin was revealed. Adam and the temptress Eve were banished from the garden of Eden and made to say 10 Our Fathers and 3 Hailey Marys as further penance for their sins. And that's the story.
CB, Dr of theology
Author of "The way it happened"
Soon to be released.
