Facebook page for premature child?

[Panacea]

Ok, so a girl I went to high school with was pregnant, and she kept posting cryptic and sad posts that made people think her baby was not going to make it.

Today I saw she posted what looked like an obituary, so sad, so I clicked it and it was a Facebook page for the baby, who was born at 23 weeks.

Her friends are all confused as to the status, if he had passed or not, and it's just a free for all of comments. She's going to post his pictures. The baby is hanging in there, as far as I can tell.

I was struck, though, this seems incredibly morbid and unnecessary to me to make a profile in a situation like this...to each their own, and I hope so much the baby makes it and grows up to use that page to mock teachers and cruise for dates. Just wondering though, would you personally do something like this??

 

[Maulds]

No that seems pretty odd

 

[Niamh]

It seems like a pretty strange thing to do

 

[brieze]

Twisted... no, I wouldn't.

 

[dkwrtw]

Sounds like she's seeking attention at the expense of her possibly dying child

 

[Panacea]

Sounds like she's seeking attention at the expense of her possibly dying child

I think so too, which is awful. To waste even a moment posting on facebook when something like this is going...idk. Not to be catty, just wondered what people thought.

 

[Peter Parka]

I'd be too worried about the baby to waste time setting up crappy social network pages.

 

[brieze]

Maybe she's hoping it will turn into a national news story and Oprah will see it and save the day by buying top doctors.

 

[Butterfly]

An online acquaintance of mine had twins at 24 weeks (a month ago). Her hubby set up a FB group for them, where they update on how the littleys are doing. It makes sense from the point of view that they need only make an update in the one central place and all their friends and family have access to it. Also, everyone who wants to offer them messages of support can post on the group too.

From that point of view, it makes sense. But a full blown profile page, IDK.

 

[NY Tall Guy]

actually, to be honest...in this day and age, this actually doesn't surprise me to read something like this happening. From what I can tell, everyone and their mother is on Facebook...probably as many that have cable TV at this point if not more hahaha...and this is coming from someone who never got into the Facebook thing and hasn't evolved past email or messenger or texting...Facebook is ingrained in people's lives in so many ways, as is the case here...to make it part of their daily ritual to put their entire life out there for people to see and read and post on......


Reading this thread however gives me a small bit of hope that not everyone is so involved in Facebook to not see how premature this idea actually is, in and of itself...If the baby was "out of the woods" in a medical sense, then I could see celebrating the baby's life now...but to do it while there is still any question whether this highly premature baby will survive the ordeal, even the most diehard Facebook fan would have to think it a bit morbid or surreal.

 

[Darrell]

Seems kind of fucked up IMO.

 

[Staci]

An online acquaintance of mine had twins at 24 weeks (a month ago). Her hubby set up a FB group for them, where they update on how the littleys are doing. It makes sense from the point of view that they need only make an update in the one central place and all their friends and family have access to it. Also, everyone who wants to offer them messages of support can post on the group too.

From that point of view, it makes sense. But a full blown profile page, IDK.

this pretty much sums up my opinion LOL

 

[HottyToddyChick]

A girl I went to HS with gave birth several weeks shy of full term. The baby lived maybe 15 minutes. She posted pictures of him everywhere on FB. It was really sad, and kind of disturbing. I believe she's since taken them down.

 

[Panacea]

A girl I went to HS with gave birth several weeks shy of full term. The baby lived maybe 15 minutes. She posted pictures of him everywhere on FB. It was really sad, and kind of disturbing. I believe she's since taken them down.

Seriously, it's just...that is rough, and I feel weird that she will post her pictures soon too. I guess sometimes we don't keep in touch with people anymore, and we feel like facebook is a good place to tell details that are a bit too personal. I'm sure I've done it too, but I wouldn't want my child on the internet in that manner.

 

[The Doc]

People do odd things when in distress

 

[Abcinthia]

Two girls I went to school with had babies prematurely; one was stillborn and one died shortly after birth and they posted pictures and one made a sort of facebook obituary page. It didn't bother me in the slightest because the baby was still their child, despite not being alive, and they were just doing what any new mother does - showing pictures and making posts about their child. One of them even dressed the baby in several different outfits (it was suggested by the doctor) to have pictures of the baby looking different.

It was heartbreakingly sad for the both of them without people criticising the manner they announced the death (they told close friends and family on the phone, everyone else found out on facebook) or that they want to show pictures of their child.

And as for the girl who made the facebook page, who knows what is going on inside her head, maybe she wants something to announce how the baby is doing or getting it ready because the baby isn't going to survive. Either way that's an awful situation to be in without people who don't know her making comments on a forum behind her back. Hopefully no one on here will ever find themselves in that position.

 

[Roxi]

Two girls I went to school with had babies prematurely; one was stillborn and one died shortly after birth and they posted pictures and one made a sort of facebook obituary page. It didn't bother me in the slightest because the baby was still their child, despite not being alive, and they were just doing what any new mother does - showing pictures and making posts about their child. One of them even dressed the baby in several different outfits (it was suggested by the doctor) to have pictures of the baby looking different.

It was heartbreakingly sad for the both of them without people criticising the manner they announced the death (they told close friends and family on the phone, everyone else found out on facebook) or that they want to show pictures of their child.

And as for the girl who made the facebook page, who knows what is going on inside her head, maybe she wants something to announce how the baby is doing or getting it ready because the baby isn't going to survive. Either way that's an awful situation to be in without people who don't know her making comments on a forum behind her back. Hopefully no one on here will ever find themselves in that position.

:homo: A very close friend and co-worker of mine a few years back lost her baby after 45mins after birth to a rare condition called Junos disease. It was heartbreaking the baby was partly deformed and she still had a open casket and has pictures of him on her facebook profile. Even if the child did not survive its still her child and I do not think anyone should judge that person or the choices they make regarding that child.

 

[pinkporridge]

I don't know I prob wouldn't. But if i did I might have a private profile with family and friends on it if this was going on. Mainly cos my family is very scattered and I don't see/ hear from most of them often. It would be an easy way to update my progress or babies progress.

 

[Natasha]

That's very sad. Not having been in that situation, I can't really say what I would do...but I do think it's a little self-absorbed for everybody to sit back and think about how it makes THEM feel to "have" to look at the pictures. *shrugs*

 

[anathelia]

From the point of view of a parent who's had a premature baby in the NICU, I can attest to the fact that it would be infinitely easier to be able to update people in one place rather than have to deal with constant calls and text messages from people asking how you or the baby is doing.

And honestly, it's not like you get to stay in the hospital with the baby when they're in the NICU either, you have to go home every night, I'm sure this person isn't updating facebook while they're at the hospital.

Everyone deals with the hard stuff in life in a different manner, and if this is hers, then so be it. No one has to look at the pictures or anything like that. It may be hard for you, but think about how much harder it is for her to have to be the one going through this. *shrug* Just a thought.