1.I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.
2."Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
3.Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.
4.I expect you to call me.
5.I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.
6.Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. A really sweet gesture can also do the trick depending.
7.No matter how cool we seem about it, if you did something bad, we're pissed off. (See #6)
8.If I'm not having sex with you, I'm...
a). ...having a fat day.
b). ...not feeling "connected" to you.
c). ...blackmailing you to get something I want.
9.My breasts love much licking and sucking.
10.If you ask me out directly, I will say yes
11.I'm very impressed when you ask for my advice.
12.We're unimpressed by men who don't take the lead. Be a man, dammit!
13.watch and wash your fingers
14.I love it when you hold my hand.
15.We need to hear how you feel about us. Tell us right now. And again in ten minutes.
16.I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this.
17.Make sure im feeling love, if you don’t want to lose me
18.None of your ex-girlfriends were ever nicer, prettier, or better in bed.
19.I like it when you tell me what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself.
20.I should always be greeted with kisses
21.Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public
22.It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...
23.For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.
24.I remember EVERY SINGLE THING about our relationship.
25.If guys' night out is going to involve strippers, remember the zoo rules: No Petting.
26.Answering "Who was that on the phone?" with "Nobody" is never going to end that conversation.
27.Believe it or not, you're probably not more attractive when you're drunk or high.
28.Never let her walk anywhere alone after 11pm.
29.Don't let your friends pick on her
30.Don't lie. We’re going to find out sooner or later.
31.MORE foreplaying
32.If you did something wrong or even if you didn't, apologize
33.Don't ask us to give head; if you are nice you just might get it.
34.Hugs and kisses must be given at all times.
35.Don't make bets about us, we always find out.
36.The female always makes The Rules
37.No male can possibly know all The Rules.
38.If the female suspects the male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.
39.We are never wrong
40.The male is expected to mind read at all times.
41.You don’t need to tell the whole world what we did in private, that’s a turn off.
42.Freaky is not bad, just make us feel comfortable and let’s keep it between us.
43.Shorts and socks with sandals is NOT sexy.
44.Pictures and videotapes are part of PRIVACY!! Don’t show or tell the world.
45.If you don’t want us let us know
46.Don’t say you feel something for us, when you don’t just because you want to fuck.we’re not toilets!!
47.Don’t look at our friends.
48.Yes, we get jealous, but is because we care and we don’t want to lose you.
49.Sometimes we want to know you get jealous too, we want to know you care.
50.You should know all this and more without me telling you. The rules are never fair. Accept this without question.
:hump
2."Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.
3.Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.
4.I expect you to call me.
5.I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.
6.Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. A really sweet gesture can also do the trick depending.
7.No matter how cool we seem about it, if you did something bad, we're pissed off. (See #6)
8.If I'm not having sex with you, I'm...
a). ...having a fat day.
b). ...not feeling "connected" to you.
c). ...blackmailing you to get something I want.
9.My breasts love much licking and sucking.
10.If you ask me out directly, I will say yes
11.I'm very impressed when you ask for my advice.
12.We're unimpressed by men who don't take the lead. Be a man, dammit!
13.watch and wash your fingers
14.I love it when you hold my hand.
15.We need to hear how you feel about us. Tell us right now. And again in ten minutes.
16.I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this.
17.Make sure im feeling love, if you don’t want to lose me
18.None of your ex-girlfriends were ever nicer, prettier, or better in bed.
19.I like it when you tell me what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself.
20.I should always be greeted with kisses
21.Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public
22.It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...
23.For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.
24.I remember EVERY SINGLE THING about our relationship.
25.If guys' night out is going to involve strippers, remember the zoo rules: No Petting.
26.Answering "Who was that on the phone?" with "Nobody" is never going to end that conversation.
27.Believe it or not, you're probably not more attractive when you're drunk or high.
28.Never let her walk anywhere alone after 11pm.
29.Don't let your friends pick on her
30.Don't lie. We’re going to find out sooner or later.
31.MORE foreplaying
32.If you did something wrong or even if you didn't, apologize
33.Don't ask us to give head; if you are nice you just might get it.
34.Hugs and kisses must be given at all times.
35.Don't make bets about us, we always find out.
36.The female always makes The Rules
37.No male can possibly know all The Rules.
38.If the female suspects the male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.
39.We are never wrong
40.The male is expected to mind read at all times.
41.You don’t need to tell the whole world what we did in private, that’s a turn off.
42.Freaky is not bad, just make us feel comfortable and let’s keep it between us.
43.Shorts and socks with sandals is NOT sexy.
44.Pictures and videotapes are part of PRIVACY!! Don’t show or tell the world.
45.If you don’t want us let us know
46.Don’t say you feel something for us, when you don’t just because you want to fuck.we’re not toilets!!
47.Don’t look at our friends.
48.Yes, we get jealous, but is because we care and we don’t want to lose you.
49.Sometimes we want to know you get jealous too, we want to know you care.
50.You should know all this and more without me telling you. The rules are never fair. Accept this without question.
:hump
