Goat Whisperer
Well-Known Member
I posted "out of body experience," and I made up a compltly different ending because... well I think that waking up at the end of a story is really boring.... so ya which one do you like more?
1) Out of body experience
Her eyes fluttered open, a cold chill ran along her spine. It was dark. She felt around herself... the floor was hard beneath her; a solid slab of bone-chilling rock. Wearily she pulled her self up onto her knees, reaching out in front of her body. She felt the cool stone that she lay on, then hesitantly crawled forward and then she abruptly stopped as she collided with a hard surface in her way. Shakily she rubbed her hands over the rough stone, feeling her way along it, until her hand discovered a wall no a jagged outcrop, she continued following the wall.
Abruptly the wall ended; nothing but empty space. She forced her eyes wide open desperate to see what lie ahead, but still, she couldn't see. She extended her arms straight out in front feeling nothing but open, cold air. She felt down and realized the rock under her hand had ended too, and that she was on the edge of.... of something, what it was, she didn't know.
She slowly rolled onto her stomach and discovered she could ease her legs over the side of the rock. Hesitantly and slowly she lowered her feet, then her legs and soon half of her body, but all she felt was the rugged rock on her chest and arms but, nothing below, or in front. Bewildered she pulled herself back on top of the seemingly floating platform and crawled in the opposite direction, with her arms outstretched, once again, she found nothing it front of her.
She felt along the edge of the cool slab which eventually backing into a stony wall. She rolled back into a sitting position, and inspected her own body. She rubbed her hand along her legs, but discovered her legs were no longer there; where her legs and body should have been there was nothing.
The darkness seeped into her eyes and blotched out her mind. Nothing. She couldn't see and it slowly began to dawn on her that since awaking in her precarious situation she had heard nothing; seen and heard nothing. Now she came to the realization that she couldn't hear. She tried pulling her self on top of her weak legs. They crumbled underneath her, and she sank back down to her meager existence. She tried to move, her arms, head, shoulders, legs, nothing was responding; she had lost control of all movement.
She forgot, who she was. She didn't know where she was, but, she knew that she was scared. Her inner-most body, her soul, was shaking and she wondered if she was a soul, and if she no longer had a body. Or perhaps, she never had a body at all; maybe her whole existence had been a far off dream. She whispered, “I'm scared,” and wasn't surprised when she didn't hear, it echo back to her ears, she couldn't even hear herself.
She rolled over onto her back, and everything became numb, lost within herself; it was black, dark, soundless, and lonely. There was nothing to see, hear, or do. “I must be insane,” she said out loud, but, she still couldn't hear a word. She screamed at the top of her lungs; no sound drifted to her ears.
“Where am I, what is this place!?” she shouted out. She knew she had said it, but, there was no familiar sound of her voice. She was in a voidness bubble; a place where nothing existed but, touch, and the noise of her thoughts, inside of her brain, that cried out for something, anything to prove her existence. She tried to let tears seep from under her eye lids but she couldn't even cry.
Time went by slowly, every minute, every second lasted for hours. She wasn't sure what to do, and irrationally she began to roll, as it was the only the she could do. When she found herself on the edge she kept on rolling, until she fell off. With a sudden rush could tell that she was falling...falling; down she went, in a whoosh of cool, dark, air. Down, down, faster and faster; there was nothing to stop her relentless falling, nothing but open air.
Air flowed past her and as she looked towards were she was falling, she could still see nothing but empty blackness; an abyss from which she began to fear would never end. She briefly wondered if she had discovered a tiny niche of the universe that went on and on forever. She began longing for the security of the ledge she had lain on before.
At first she was falling, but eventually the sensation was replaced by a feeling of floating, between the void of time and space, nothing changing but, the wind blowing past her. If she even existed, she no longer knew. She only knew that she could hear herself speaking from inside her conscience, crying out for something to change this abysmal experience. She knew it made no difference whether her eyes were open or not, and she became unsure if she had eyes at all anymore.
She felt nothing, heard nothing, and saw nothing; a bare dank world. She wanted to give up, and tried to fall asleep hoping to leave this terrible place of non-existence; she wanted to return to her dream world but she had no control. Her descent continued; falling through her endless hole in space.
Almost imperceptibly at first she noticed a faint, small light that seemed to grow, bigger and bigger, until it engulfed her; blinded her. All in a flash she could see, here, feel-- feel herself. The light blinded her at first, but after blinking a few times she was able to see clearly; she could hear soft beeps, and the clinking and rustling of metal. A man appeared with a blue mask covering his mouth and his body blocked the light from above.
This man said something, but it was a garbled mesh of words. Slowly she began to understand what he was saying, “I think she is going to be alright.” The man walked away, and she closed her eyes, and opened them again. She still found herself in the room, with the blinding light glaring back at her from above.
She tried to speak, but, their was something blocking in her throat blocking her throat. She gave-up and sullenly allowed her eyes to close. For a moment she was afraid she would return to the darkness, but she was too exhausted to care. She fell back into a slumber.
Not soon after, her eyes opened again. The room she was in had a fluorescent glow, without the blinding light in her eyes. She moved her stiff neck to the side and saw a clear window, looking into a bright blue sky. “I'm back.” Her hoarse dry voice whispered out. “I'm back.”
1) Out of body experience
Her eyes fluttered open, a cold chill ran along her spine. It was dark. She felt around herself... the floor was hard beneath her; a solid slab of bone-chilling rock. Wearily she pulled her self up onto her knees, reaching out in front of her body. She felt the cool stone that she lay on, then hesitantly crawled forward and then she abruptly stopped as she collided with a hard surface in her way. Shakily she rubbed her hands over the rough stone, feeling her way along it, until her hand discovered a wall no a jagged outcrop, she continued following the wall.
Abruptly the wall ended; nothing but empty space. She forced her eyes wide open desperate to see what lie ahead, but still, she couldn't see. She extended her arms straight out in front feeling nothing but open, cold air. She felt down and realized the rock under her hand had ended too, and that she was on the edge of.... of something, what it was, she didn't know.
She slowly rolled onto her stomach and discovered she could ease her legs over the side of the rock. Hesitantly and slowly she lowered her feet, then her legs and soon half of her body, but all she felt was the rugged rock on her chest and arms but, nothing below, or in front. Bewildered she pulled herself back on top of the seemingly floating platform and crawled in the opposite direction, with her arms outstretched, once again, she found nothing it front of her.
She felt along the edge of the cool slab which eventually backing into a stony wall. She rolled back into a sitting position, and inspected her own body. She rubbed her hand along her legs, but discovered her legs were no longer there; where her legs and body should have been there was nothing.
The darkness seeped into her eyes and blotched out her mind. Nothing. She couldn't see and it slowly began to dawn on her that since awaking in her precarious situation she had heard nothing; seen and heard nothing. Now she came to the realization that she couldn't hear. She tried pulling her self on top of her weak legs. They crumbled underneath her, and she sank back down to her meager existence. She tried to move, her arms, head, shoulders, legs, nothing was responding; she had lost control of all movement.
She forgot, who she was. She didn't know where she was, but, she knew that she was scared. Her inner-most body, her soul, was shaking and she wondered if she was a soul, and if she no longer had a body. Or perhaps, she never had a body at all; maybe her whole existence had been a far off dream. She whispered, “I'm scared,” and wasn't surprised when she didn't hear, it echo back to her ears, she couldn't even hear herself.
She rolled over onto her back, and everything became numb, lost within herself; it was black, dark, soundless, and lonely. There was nothing to see, hear, or do. “I must be insane,” she said out loud, but, she still couldn't hear a word. She screamed at the top of her lungs; no sound drifted to her ears.
“Where am I, what is this place!?” she shouted out. She knew she had said it, but, there was no familiar sound of her voice. She was in a voidness bubble; a place where nothing existed but, touch, and the noise of her thoughts, inside of her brain, that cried out for something, anything to prove her existence. She tried to let tears seep from under her eye lids but she couldn't even cry.
Time went by slowly, every minute, every second lasted for hours. She wasn't sure what to do, and irrationally she began to roll, as it was the only the she could do. When she found herself on the edge she kept on rolling, until she fell off. With a sudden rush could tell that she was falling...falling; down she went, in a whoosh of cool, dark, air. Down, down, faster and faster; there was nothing to stop her relentless falling, nothing but open air.
Air flowed past her and as she looked towards were she was falling, she could still see nothing but empty blackness; an abyss from which she began to fear would never end. She briefly wondered if she had discovered a tiny niche of the universe that went on and on forever. She began longing for the security of the ledge she had lain on before.
At first she was falling, but eventually the sensation was replaced by a feeling of floating, between the void of time and space, nothing changing but, the wind blowing past her. If she even existed, she no longer knew. She only knew that she could hear herself speaking from inside her conscience, crying out for something to change this abysmal experience. She knew it made no difference whether her eyes were open or not, and she became unsure if she had eyes at all anymore.
She felt nothing, heard nothing, and saw nothing; a bare dank world. She wanted to give up, and tried to fall asleep hoping to leave this terrible place of non-existence; she wanted to return to her dream world but she had no control. Her descent continued; falling through her endless hole in space.
Almost imperceptibly at first she noticed a faint, small light that seemed to grow, bigger and bigger, until it engulfed her; blinded her. All in a flash she could see, here, feel-- feel herself. The light blinded her at first, but after blinking a few times she was able to see clearly; she could hear soft beeps, and the clinking and rustling of metal. A man appeared with a blue mask covering his mouth and his body blocked the light from above.
This man said something, but it was a garbled mesh of words. Slowly she began to understand what he was saying, “I think she is going to be alright.” The man walked away, and she closed her eyes, and opened them again. She still found herself in the room, with the blinding light glaring back at her from above.
She tried to speak, but, their was something blocking in her throat blocking her throat. She gave-up and sullenly allowed her eyes to close. For a moment she was afraid she would return to the darkness, but she was too exhausted to care. She fell back into a slumber.
Not soon after, her eyes opened again. The room she was in had a fluorescent glow, without the blinding light in her eyes. She moved her stiff neck to the side and saw a clear window, looking into a bright blue sky. “I'm back.” Her hoarse dry voice whispered out. “I'm back.”