Tired of it.

[SilentEyz]

I am so tired of feeling the way I have. feeling the way I do, I just can't shake feelings and thoughts, Inner Demons I guess they are. a part of me just cant stand them anymore, and a bigger part of me does not want to let go of them. Its like they are my life source, they are all I have even if I don't like what they have to say, to let go of them would be leaving myself empty of the only thing I know. I keep thinking there has to be a way to move myself beyond where my mind lies, and yet I never find it, I circle back into myself everytime. my thoughts so harsh and cruel. How to get past yourself.. Is it even possible, or do you become what you lothe in trying?

 

[Veronica]

u can fight your inner demons!

 

[Kat]

hey silent...maybe this might help a little bit...you may have read it before. I posted it back when i first joined the otz crew...but its an old poem...it helped me more than a few times

"Finding My Way"​

I turn my back on the world, that's been so cruel to me.
I walk this path alone, as it always seems to be.
Like a blind man walking, I seek to find my way.
Wondering when fate will deal me a better hand.
I long to run away, from all my worries and my fears.
But no matter how far or fast I run, they will always be right here.
They seem to follow me like a shadow I'll never quite outrun.
Then I finally realize it will always be this way.
because no matter how good my hiding spot,
no matter my disguise,
I can never fool myself, no matter how hard I try.
I am all my worries and my fears.
To lose them I lose myself.
The only course to take is to overcome them,
and prove to the world I am stronger.
So once again I look towards the horizion standing as tall as I can.
Finally I understand that you have to walk this path alone
to find yourself...and the happiness you lost so long ago.


​

hang in there hun...you are a wonderful amazing person...and so beautiful...i know how you feel...and i am always here for you...you can do it hun...i have faith in you

*HUGS*xoxoxo
​

 

[TheOriginalJames]

*hands Silent a rose*

You're special. Inner demons can be overcome.

 

[lemon]

* takes james' post away *

see? inner demons can be overcome.

 

[BreakfastSurreal]

everyone has thoughts...its what you do with those thoughts that count. have you ever seen a clockwork orange? Well the point of that movie is that everyone has really really fucked up thoughts...and in the movie they act on those thoughts, and well, its just a really fucked up movie. It's all about making good choices for yourself and choosing not to listen to those thoughts...we all have them at some point. You just have to learn to ignore them.

 

[SilentEyz]

IF it was as simple as just ignoring them, then they wouldn't be tearing me to nothing.. But its cool.. I don't expect people to understand..

Just felt the need to vent... Im done .. *Shuts-up and returns to her corner*

 

[TheOriginalJames]

*pulls silent back from her corner*

We wub you!

 

[Kat]

^^ yeah what he said...exactally

 

[Kat]

p.s. vent away girl ifin ya need too

 

[AUDRAA]

Silent, you need to find a way to let them go. They arent all of you. You are so much more, and when you can let some of it go, you will find a different you underneath them that has been waiting to find its way out.I know its hard to let go of things that you feel make you who you are, but trust me hun they arent all of you ,as much as they feel like they might be. Start slow let one thing go at a time, like letting a balloon float away in the sky and replace it with something new. When you can do this you will feel better honestly. you are wasting so much energy that you dont even realize on this vicious circle you have created.

 

[random guy 517]

all u need 2 do is let evrythin clouding ur mind go. find an outlet to release anger, sorrow, resentments, wutevr it is. or take a vacation to get away from it all and calm down. talkin 2 sum1 helps (unless u hate talkin like me). keepin those things locked up only makes u bitter (trust me, i know).

if this doesnt work (or u find that its all useless bullcrap =p), hope u move on soon.

 

[Trance97]

Eating also helps.....for awhile. It may actually make things worse. Depending on what and how much you eat. So maybe exercise? That will do you good and it calms stress.

 

[lemon]

remember silent, im in the dark corner across the room, if you want to talk.

 

[Veronica]

all u need 2 do is let evrythin clouding ur mind go. find an outlet to release anger, sorrow, resentments, wutevr it is. or take a vacation to get away from it all and calm down. talkin 2 sum1 helps (unless u hate talkin like me). keepin those things locked up only makes u bitter (trust me, i know).

if this doesnt work (or u find that its all useless bullcrap =p), hope u move on soon.

I agree with this response.

 

[Haus]

Silent im so sorry your feeling this way. as other members on here know i used to feel destroyed in side cause of this girl i was freinds with. best freinds Actually. she destroyed me inside so bad and dint give a shit about it. this used to be my song about my life. it was called Down with the sickness by Disturbed.

give it a listen to. YouTube - Disturbed - Down With the Sickness

i dont really feel that way since i dont talk to the town whore anymore so shes not there to destroy me anymore.

music helps me cope with things. i pick a song for the way im feeling and listen to it.

 

[Peter Parka]

Sorry to hear you're feeling that way. Letting it all out on here can help.