One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT????!!! What was
that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She
responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me
for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to
spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping
at a big, big unnamed dept. store. I walked around with her
while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't
decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them
all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets
get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry dept.
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she
was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know
how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's
fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think
this is all dear, let's go to the cashier". I could hardly contain myself
when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for awhile.. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
:24:
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT????!!! What was
that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She
responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me
for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to
spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping
at a big, big unnamed dept. store. I walked around with her
while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't
decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them
all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets
get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry dept.
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she
was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know
how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's
fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think
this is all dear, let's go to the cashier". I could hardly contain myself
when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for awhile.. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
:24:
wned:
