MJ's Blue Lagoon

[jassilem]

I am having a silly happy mommy moment.

Liam got up stripped off and went to potty on his own and actually peed.

This is a slow process but dammit he's getting it when we don't make him use it... so.. is that the key he has to do it on his own time and when he's ready?

 

[The Man]

Just tell him to go pee once in a while..whether he needs to or not.
Then in a couple weeks ask him once in a while if he needs to pee.
If that fails...take him to the store and let him pick out some cool spider man{or similar underwear}..whatever he picks out.
Then when you get home dont give em to him,tell him they are his big boy underwear and he gets em in three days of no peeing on himself.
If still no luck...made a very big deal out of having to clean him up,make him do it

 

[jassilem]

I have done all that.

 

[The Man]

You will have to just wait it out then..too young to bribe with a go kart

 

[jassilem]

Yeah he's 3 and dangerous enough on two feet let alone something like that.

 

[The Man]

Times flies..just seems like a couple years ago he was born..I must be getting old here..all the years blend together

 

[jassilem]

Yeah Jim made a huge deal about it at the other place.. it was very public.

 

[The Man]

He is very proud

 

[jassilem]

Yes he is.

 

[jassilem]

I Owe My Mother


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA ..
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favourite:
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !"

Only you folks my age understand these profound statements!!!
But, there is one missing from this list~~My personal all time favourite!!

My mother taught me about CHOICE.
"Do you want me to stop this car?"

 

[jassilem]

Hehehe... this one made me chuckle...

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me Life, between the legs of me wife !"


That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night !


He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of The night."


She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."


"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.


The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street Corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at The pub with a toast about you, Mary."


She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been in there twice in the last four years. "Once I had to pull him by the ears to make him come, and the other time he fell asleep".

 

[jassilem]

OMG it's scary when you child just channels you... omg


Liam said I got a question for you.... I say that all the time to Jim...

Oh boy... *shakes head*

 

[satinbutterfly]

The toast made me chuckle.

 

[Francis]

I Owe My Mother


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA ..
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favourite:
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !"

Only you folks my age understand these profound statements!!!
But, there is one missing from this list~~My personal all time favourite!!

My mother taught me about CHOICE.
"Do you want me to stop this car?"

I knew there was something special about you.. We had the same MOTHER...

 

[jassilem]

I knew there was something special about you.. We had the same MOTHER...

haha and the saddest part is I see myself saying some of the things to Liam... smh.

 

[Francis]

haha and the saddest part is I see myself saying some of the things to Liam... smh.

Nope I can't.. I'm not Francis is mother.. :24:

 

[jassilem]

Debating on what I want to get...



or

 

[dancingpotato]

I want a new tattoo. I dunno what or where though

 

[jassilem]

I have 3 more planned... and I know where for each.. I just have to come up with the cash and guts LOL

 

[dancingpotato]

I don't need guts, I just need to lose some weight and decide where I want my next one