A tragic tale of love lost.
Lost in the Post
I was reading one of those magazines
With pictures of girls from the Philippines
It said they delivered ‘brides by post’
So I picked out the girl I liked the most
Now she was a girl named Angelina
Dressed in a bikini down at the marina
She looked real good laid on the deck
So I filled in the form and wrote out a check
I watched for the postman coming to my house
To deliver a package containing my spouse
But I never got the girl I liked the most
My mail order bride got lost in the post
I went to the Post Office in the High Street
I said to the clerk ’I’m expecting a treat
A hot Asian babe from over the sea
Please tell me that you have a parcel for me’
‘Can you describe the contents please’?
I told him ‘Five feet tall with 36Cs’
But he couldn’t find the girl I liked the most
I guess she must have got lost in the post
I begged him to please take another look
So he opened up an important looking book
As he read these words I was so dismayed
She was’ Returned to Sender - Postage Underpaid’
So I reached right over gave him a smack
For sending my cute Filipina back
For she was the girl I liked the most
My mail order bride was returned in the post
He said ‘Hey man adjust your attitude
When your girl arrived she was in the nude
She should have worn postage stamps at least
So we had no choice but to send her back East ‘
Sweet Angelina, I never even kissed her
So from the magazine I chose her little sister
‘Cos she’s the girl I like second most
I hope she doesn’t get lost in the post