GraceAbounds
Well-Known Member
> If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down
> when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first
> date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.
>
> Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first
> date that a woman ever had.
>
> The winner described her worst first date experience. There was
> absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
>
> She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold...and the guy had
> taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was
> a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly
> had never met before.
>
> The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
> home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain,
> when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that
> extra latte...
>
> They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the
> middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which
> she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow
> going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop
> and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his
> car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked
> her pants down and started.
>
> In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt
> rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on
> the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real
> gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was
> the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the
> situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another
sensation.
>
> As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her
> buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of
> tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to
> disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that
> she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.
>
> Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she
> answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
> reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off" and in need of some
> assistance!
>
> He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater
> and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out
> laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
> compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
>
> Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced
> with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free
> her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!
>
> Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first
> place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
> free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded
> to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience
> screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or
> perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date
> was embarrassing.
>
> Jay Leno's comment..."This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed
> off."
>
> Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was
> sitting next to her on the Leno show.
> when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first
> date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.
>
> Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first
> date that a woman ever had.
>
> The winner described her worst first date experience. There was
> absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
>
> She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold...and the guy had
> taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was
> a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly
> had never met before.
>
> The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
> home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain,
> when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that
> extra latte...
>
> They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the
> middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which
> she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow
> going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop
> and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his
> car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked
> her pants down and started.
>
> In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt
> rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on
> the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real
> gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was
> the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the
> situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another
sensation.
>
> As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her
> buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of
> tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to
> disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that
> she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.
>
> Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she
> answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
> reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off" and in need of some
> assistance!
>
> He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater
> and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out
> laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
> compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
>
> Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced
> with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free
> her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!
>
> Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first
> place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
> free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded
> to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience
> screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or
> perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date
> was embarrassing.
>
> Jay Leno's comment..."This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed
> off."
>
> Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was
> sitting next to her on the Leno show.
