HouseOvaries
OTz Official Attention Whore
I wrote this on another forum a long time ago. Read this stuff:
This is about the way I act on forums here. Back when I was just a noob here, I remember I used to post in regular threads and actually had a "normal" and good conversation with everybody here. I noticed though as the days and weeks go by that I somehow started slipping and eventually joined the forum games board. Ever since I joined there, I realized to myself, "Wow, I can spam on this board here!" Little did I know at the time that not every single place could allow spam cuz it was against the rules and obviously annoy everybody. But for some odd reason, it's like I ignored that voice telling me, "Don't spam! It's not good and you'll regret it in the end." But what did I do?! I spammed of course and I did it so much that it was almost uncontrollable and it couldn't be stopped.
Until the day that came when I first saw the screen saying, "Your post restriction has been suspended". I remember the day I freaked out cuz of that and maybe it was cuz I was so used to that word called, "spam". Maybe, if I wouldn't get so happy over it, then I wouldn't expect to do it so much anymore. As the days, weeks, and even months went on I started slipping even lower to where I couldn't be liked by anyone not even a member that was a good friend of mine. I remember how that would always affect me for some stupid reason and I tried to get myself back up to normal where I could be just the "cool" guy again. Sometimes, I wonder if I could fall into a category like, "the cool guy" or the "bad guy" cuz of the way I change too much. For awhile there, I thought I would never change my ways and that was when I thought I was always cool. Then to when I always thought I was uncool all the time. Eventually, when I tried categorizing myself as the "cool guy", I realized that I was being the "bad guy" and it got me banned from here. Many times it has happened and I still wonder why this all happened cuz of me liking spam for the very first time on a simple board here. Even when I was banned, I would still act like the same annoying asshole with no life and tried getting my own way all the time.
Once again, I didn't think and it was making my life and TPBs life much harder. It's like I didn't cooperate that easily with him, so I thought to myself..."how about being a nice member". I didn't think that was possible cuz of the way I previously acted on the boards here, so I completely gave up. I felt TPB lost all trust and hope for me, so I went off the forums for awhile when I was banned for the 2nd time (shivers...). Then one day out of the blue, an old friend of mine Gnar Kill said that TPB gave me yet again "another chance". I thought he was seriously lying about this cuz I thought TPB lost all trust in me cuz of my actions before on the boards here. I was happy to be back again and this was the time for me to show my "good side" for once. Maybe, even the side of me that I thought was "good" back in the day. I remember seeing a few happy faces cuz I returned and not so many happy faces. I wasn't surprised that I saw some people unhappy cuz of me returning.
In fact, I was expecting much more pissed off people cuz they thought I haven't learned my lesson yet, but I hope that I did surprise them, though. I have been through a lot these past few months and I feel like I kept on changing my ways too often. Until this very day, I still wonder if I have changed at all cuz sometimes I think I do and sometimes I think I don't at all. I could mention some comparisons of me to other people, but that would just cause some flames. Which is something that I was unfortunately good at back then. I have noticed that most people say that I've changed a whole lot, sice my days of being an annoying bastard with nothing to do but flame people and spam. I believe that I have greatly minimized my spamming ways here, but I'm not exactly sure everyone thinks that way about me quite yet.
Should I leave for a break every now and then? Should I stay here all the time and post good discussions for once? Should I seriously never return again cuz I act the same way as before? These are questions that I can never seem to answer myself, but maybe some others here could. I could seriously expect a lot of "leave for good" answers, but maybe t's the truth. Maybe, I should do what you would call, "live a little" and go have some fun every once in awhile. Maybe, go do some extracurricular activity or just simply take a walk outside and get some fresh air every now and then. If anybody out there agrees with anything I said above, then please comment. I personally don't care if it is a good or bad comment cuz any information right now could be helpful to me in the long run.
Hell, it could possibly change my ways around here, maybe even in real life if that's the case. I wanna know, because I wanna be a good person and I'd like it to stay that way for as long as possible.
This is about the way I act on forums here. Back when I was just a noob here, I remember I used to post in regular threads and actually had a "normal" and good conversation with everybody here. I noticed though as the days and weeks go by that I somehow started slipping and eventually joined the forum games board. Ever since I joined there, I realized to myself, "Wow, I can spam on this board here!" Little did I know at the time that not every single place could allow spam cuz it was against the rules and obviously annoy everybody. But for some odd reason, it's like I ignored that voice telling me, "Don't spam! It's not good and you'll regret it in the end." But what did I do?! I spammed of course and I did it so much that it was almost uncontrollable and it couldn't be stopped.
Until the day that came when I first saw the screen saying, "Your post restriction has been suspended". I remember the day I freaked out cuz of that and maybe it was cuz I was so used to that word called, "spam". Maybe, if I wouldn't get so happy over it, then I wouldn't expect to do it so much anymore. As the days, weeks, and even months went on I started slipping even lower to where I couldn't be liked by anyone not even a member that was a good friend of mine. I remember how that would always affect me for some stupid reason and I tried to get myself back up to normal where I could be just the "cool" guy again. Sometimes, I wonder if I could fall into a category like, "the cool guy" or the "bad guy" cuz of the way I change too much. For awhile there, I thought I would never change my ways and that was when I thought I was always cool. Then to when I always thought I was uncool all the time. Eventually, when I tried categorizing myself as the "cool guy", I realized that I was being the "bad guy" and it got me banned from here. Many times it has happened and I still wonder why this all happened cuz of me liking spam for the very first time on a simple board here. Even when I was banned, I would still act like the same annoying asshole with no life and tried getting my own way all the time.
Once again, I didn't think and it was making my life and TPBs life much harder. It's like I didn't cooperate that easily with him, so I thought to myself..."how about being a nice member". I didn't think that was possible cuz of the way I previously acted on the boards here, so I completely gave up. I felt TPB lost all trust and hope for me, so I went off the forums for awhile when I was banned for the 2nd time (shivers...). Then one day out of the blue, an old friend of mine Gnar Kill said that TPB gave me yet again "another chance". I thought he was seriously lying about this cuz I thought TPB lost all trust in me cuz of my actions before on the boards here. I was happy to be back again and this was the time for me to show my "good side" for once. Maybe, even the side of me that I thought was "good" back in the day. I remember seeing a few happy faces cuz I returned and not so many happy faces. I wasn't surprised that I saw some people unhappy cuz of me returning.
In fact, I was expecting much more pissed off people cuz they thought I haven't learned my lesson yet, but I hope that I did surprise them, though. I have been through a lot these past few months and I feel like I kept on changing my ways too often. Until this very day, I still wonder if I have changed at all cuz sometimes I think I do and sometimes I think I don't at all. I could mention some comparisons of me to other people, but that would just cause some flames. Which is something that I was unfortunately good at back then. I have noticed that most people say that I've changed a whole lot, sice my days of being an annoying bastard with nothing to do but flame people and spam. I believe that I have greatly minimized my spamming ways here, but I'm not exactly sure everyone thinks that way about me quite yet.
Should I leave for a break every now and then? Should I stay here all the time and post good discussions for once? Should I seriously never return again cuz I act the same way as before? These are questions that I can never seem to answer myself, but maybe some others here could. I could seriously expect a lot of "leave for good" answers, but maybe t's the truth. Maybe, I should do what you would call, "live a little" and go have some fun every once in awhile. Maybe, go do some extracurricular activity or just simply take a walk outside and get some fresh air every now and then. If anybody out there agrees with anything I said above, then please comment. I personally don't care if it is a good or bad comment cuz any information right now could be helpful to me in the long run.
Hell, it could possibly change my ways around here, maybe even in real life if that's the case. I wanna know, because I wanna be a good person and I'd like it to stay that way for as long as possible.
