Confession thread

I just finished a gigglefest with my office neighbor, which included imitating a man's disgusting throat noises.
 
gLing said:
You're going to hell...


:p
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You've never seen pants go up so quick, except the time this happened...


Distorted said:
When my wife and I first started going out years ago she still lived at home.(she was 17) Her parents had 2 houses, 1 in town, the other at the lake. They were gone to the lake house to cut the grass, etc... and I showed up at their main house. Her father's rules were no boys in her room. Period. Just to note, the man is a scary dude with a reputation. So anyways, we're in her room fooling around :lol: , and we are completely naked except for me wearing a dome. Her house was divided weird. If you walked in the front door, there were stairs facing you to go upstairs. There was about 5 steps, then a landing. then a right turn and about 8 more steps. If you wanted to go to the kitchen etc... from the front door you turned left and went up about 5 stairs (another set)

Her room was over the garage with windows facing the street. So I was going to town with her on her very noisy daybed, with it squeaking loudly and banging the wall. She had me stop and told me to check outside, she heard something. I look out and her father is there unloading their lawn tractor. I stood there frozen with nothing on but a condom. After a few seconds of asking me what it was, she got up and looked. She slapped me in the head and yelled, "my parents!" I started putting my clothes on quickly and she just shoveled me and the clothes out her door yelling at me to get to the other part of the house before they come in. So I leg it down the first set of stairs wearing only a condom and socks. I got to the top of the other stairs to enter the kitchen and I stopped before I opened the door to go in. I figured I better put the rest of my clothes on in case they beat me inside. If someone was inside it would have sounded like elephants running down the stairs.

Once I slapped my clothes on I opened the door and her mother is standing in the kitchen looking at me. There was a bathroom right there so I said, "Hi" and made a bee-line for it. Once I got in I looked in the mirror and my hair was all over the place. I had huge streaks on mascara on my face from my wife, my shirt was buttoned wrong and a piece was stuck in my fly. And I still had the condom on.

So my wife had quickly gotten dressed and made it downstairs and was sitting on the couch when I came out of the bathroom. I sat down beside her and remember being relieved it was only her mother inside, and not her father. Anyways, my wife was squirming on the couch, and she reaches in the back of her pants and pulls out her underwear she forgot to put on. I lost it. I just started laughing so hard we had to leave. After we left, my wife asked me, "Do you think she knows?" :lol:

She was on the pill the next week.
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