that I told you I'd try to find. I posted it in another forum, did a search today and found it. 
I posted this back when I used to work at Verizon. In '05...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
This is a public service announcement
*To everyone who uses the refrigerator at the office. I have noticed the following
and would like to propose an amicable solution so that we can all go back to
pretending to get along with each other.
1. The office refrigerator is not your personal space to store your 20 frozen meals
because you're too lazy to bring one from home every day. There are 68 people
sharing one fridge, and many of us bring lunch to work and would like a place to
put it. Please bring your “Smart Ones” (an oxymoron for you if I've ever heard one),
one at a time like the rest of us.
2. There's a machine right behind you with lots of cold beverages. Please get your
28 bottles of water and pop out of the fridge. If you are wondering why some of them
disappear occasionally, I was thirsty. That goes for you too oversized Ms. Brita pitcher lady.
3. Putting your name on things. I'm guessing this came from your college days where your
deadbeat roommate would eat anything in the fridge and not pay you for half of it. I don't
care how many times you put your name on that sandwich in the fridge. If it's there for
more than a week, it's going in the trash. If you are a repeat offender, I might trash it
after a day just for the fun of listening to you complain to everyone in the office about
how someone keeps stealing your lunch.
4. Speaking of things left for more than a week, there are science experiments going on with
certain things in the fridge. A fun experiment would be forcing you to eat whatever is in there.
Alas, if you are looking for the person who threw away your prized tupperware, it was me.
There's no chance I am cleaning it for you - get your stuff out of the fridge.
5. I know you had a wonderful time in Rome/Greece/Spain/London/Whereveristan,
and I know it made you smile sending us that postcard from there while we were stuck
here at office, but we don’t need reminder of your wonderful trip on the front of the refrigerator
for months after you’re back. I hear they like to say arse over there – that’s where your postcard can go.
6. The 230 coffee pots on the counter that are reproducing new spawn every day is just and
obvious reminder of how much everyone hates each other. I guess I can understand a little:
when I make coffee, I really appreciate it when I come back to get a nice fresh, hot cup
and witness Mr. Gynormous Thermomug guy filling up his 1 gallon coffee mug.
Here buddy, want some of my creamer for that?
8. We are very fortunate to have a refrigerator with an ice maker here at the office.
It would be nice if you didn’t fill up your gargantuan sports flask with ice every morning
so the rest of us can have some ice before the afternoon.
9. No, the yummy flavored creamer in the fridge is NOT communal! You have to bring in your
own milk and that foofy flavored creamer.
10. I know the fridge is packed full of stuff and lunches are everywhere, but if you have to move
other people’s lunches in order to get to yours, can you please put it back on the shelf where
it was originally? Otherwise, you end up looking endlessly for your lunch like an idiot.
On second thought, I’m going out to eat. Right after I throw away everything in the fridge.
I posted this back when I used to work at Verizon. In '05...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
This is a public service announcement
*To everyone who uses the refrigerator at the office. I have noticed the following
and would like to propose an amicable solution so that we can all go back to
pretending to get along with each other.
1. The office refrigerator is not your personal space to store your 20 frozen meals
because you're too lazy to bring one from home every day. There are 68 people
sharing one fridge, and many of us bring lunch to work and would like a place to
put it. Please bring your “Smart Ones” (an oxymoron for you if I've ever heard one),
one at a time like the rest of us.
2. There's a machine right behind you with lots of cold beverages. Please get your
28 bottles of water and pop out of the fridge. If you are wondering why some of them
disappear occasionally, I was thirsty. That goes for you too oversized Ms. Brita pitcher lady.
3. Putting your name on things. I'm guessing this came from your college days where your
deadbeat roommate would eat anything in the fridge and not pay you for half of it. I don't
care how many times you put your name on that sandwich in the fridge. If it's there for
more than a week, it's going in the trash. If you are a repeat offender, I might trash it
after a day just for the fun of listening to you complain to everyone in the office about
how someone keeps stealing your lunch.
4. Speaking of things left for more than a week, there are science experiments going on with
certain things in the fridge. A fun experiment would be forcing you to eat whatever is in there.
Alas, if you are looking for the person who threw away your prized tupperware, it was me.
There's no chance I am cleaning it for you - get your stuff out of the fridge.
5. I know you had a wonderful time in Rome/Greece/Spain/London/Whereveristan,
and I know it made you smile sending us that postcard from there while we were stuck
here at office, but we don’t need reminder of your wonderful trip on the front of the refrigerator
for months after you’re back. I hear they like to say arse over there – that’s where your postcard can go.
6. The 230 coffee pots on the counter that are reproducing new spawn every day is just and
obvious reminder of how much everyone hates each other. I guess I can understand a little:
when I make coffee, I really appreciate it when I come back to get a nice fresh, hot cup
and witness Mr. Gynormous Thermomug guy filling up his 1 gallon coffee mug.
Here buddy, want some of my creamer for that?
8. We are very fortunate to have a refrigerator with an ice maker here at the office.
It would be nice if you didn’t fill up your gargantuan sports flask with ice every morning
so the rest of us can have some ice before the afternoon.
9. No, the yummy flavored creamer in the fridge is NOT communal! You have to bring in your
own milk and that foofy flavored creamer.
10. I know the fridge is packed full of stuff and lunches are everywhere, but if you have to move
other people’s lunches in order to get to yours, can you please put it back on the shelf where
it was originally? Otherwise, you end up looking endlessly for your lunch like an idiot.
On second thought, I’m going out to eat. Right after I throw away everything in the fridge.
