These serious threads SHOULD stay on topic. 
If you got Beef with another member.....
- Thread starter Haus
- Start date
Haus started it!!!
Where's the beef!?!
While I really want to whole heartedly agree with this .. there is also the fact that I don't want someone who doesn't like me filling my PM box/rep section up with hate either. I'd rather people know that they are bullying me in open forum than have to put up with being harrassed via PM.
Sometimes arguments just happen to where it occurs on a forum .. not everyone is going to agree .. and to just say "take it to PM's" doesn't really solve anything, it just puts the issue behind closed doors for "us" to deal with personally .. so the rest of you don't have to be "bothered" with it .. Or that's the way it feels anyway. Sometimes you need someone to stand up for you .. and that isn't going to happen when being bullied in PM's.
And putting someone on ignore is really annoying .. because you can only see parts of a conversation .. and you can't tell wtf is going on, because you just see replies and have no clue wtf people are talking about. You're basically taking yourself out of most of the forum discussion by using ignore.
I think people just need to learn to not be such smart asses and quit being childish and calling people names. We've got what 2-3 minors here .. and they're the only ones not bickering like freaking children all the time.
I know personally, I'm sick of having ot defend my own beliefs .. if I want to belive what I believe that shouldn't chap anyone's ass .. I'm not trying to force them on anyone else (and I don't think anyone else is either) just because I voice them in a thread .. people just need to get a grip imo.
why do people get into arguments on here anyway? isn't this the place we are supposed to come and destress from our daily lives? its hard to come on here and listen to all the arguing because thats what i get all day long at work. just get along!!!
Okay....I guess after reading every page, and every post, I finally decided to post some things that I feel are perhaps good soound advice:
1. Not everything has to do with you, sometimes, people just say things and they are not always directed at one particular person(s).
2. In life, you are going to find that some people depsite your best efforts, are simply not going to like you, understand that now, come to grips with it.
3. You can in fact disagree with someone and not attack them. I do it all the time. Me not agreeing with you is not an indication of my opinion of you as a person, just an opinion on your opinion.
4. Dragging diry laundry out in the public arena is selfish, it eventually winds up dragging everyone down into some sort of negative vibe. If you cannot handle the issue like mature adults, ignore one another (I learned that one like in grade school
).
5. Respect of ones culture, ethnicity, sexual orientation and gender should be practiced, because as humans, we all deserve a little respect...If for any other reason. I personally respect people less who seem unable to leave those issues out of conversation. A true sign of maturity and integrity is someone who can find something better to grasp at than those issues.
6. If you cannot come in here without either attacking someone or feeling like you are being attacked, perhaps taking a break from here will make you feel a little better, give you a fresh perspective on things, and make your remember why you came here to begin with, to have fun and find folks who wanted the same thing from here.
7. If you can find one positive thing in each person both here and in your everyday life, it is easier to tolerate people when they let you down. It takes much less energy to love than hate, so try, however faltering we all can be, to find something positive about everyone, no matter how hard it is.
Bottom line, having fun here is as much personal responsibility as anyone elses.
Love and peace
1. Not everything has to do with you, sometimes, people just say things and they are not always directed at one particular person(s).
2. In life, you are going to find that some people depsite your best efforts, are simply not going to like you, understand that now, come to grips with it.
3. You can in fact disagree with someone and not attack them. I do it all the time. Me not agreeing with you is not an indication of my opinion of you as a person, just an opinion on your opinion.
4. Dragging diry laundry out in the public arena is selfish, it eventually winds up dragging everyone down into some sort of negative vibe. If you cannot handle the issue like mature adults, ignore one another (I learned that one like in grade school
).5. Respect of ones culture, ethnicity, sexual orientation and gender should be practiced, because as humans, we all deserve a little respect...If for any other reason. I personally respect people less who seem unable to leave those issues out of conversation. A true sign of maturity and integrity is someone who can find something better to grasp at than those issues.
6. If you cannot come in here without either attacking someone or feeling like you are being attacked, perhaps taking a break from here will make you feel a little better, give you a fresh perspective on things, and make your remember why you came here to begin with, to have fun and find folks who wanted the same thing from here.
7. If you can find one positive thing in each person both here and in your everyday life, it is easier to tolerate people when they let you down. It takes much less energy to love than hate, so try, however faltering we all can be, to find something positive about everyone, no matter how hard it is.
Bottom line, having fun here is as much personal responsibility as anyone elses.
Love and peace
I agree with Haus, who made this thread, Dt3 and BB.
I can also say that I had someone on ignore for various reasons, for 3 months and I still worked out what the rest of the thread was about. 
I can also say that I had someone on ignore for various reasons, for 3 months and I still worked out what the rest of the thread was about.
i can always work it out
[FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times]Wreckers or Builders
I watched them tearing a building down,
A gang of men in a busy town.
With a ho-heave-ho and lusty yell,
They swung a beam and a sidewall fell.
I asked the foreman, "Are these men skilled,
As the men you'd hire if you had to build?"
He gave me a laugh and said, "No indeed!
Just common labor is all I need.
I can easily wreck in a day or two
What builders have taken a year to do."
And I tho't to myself as I went my way,
Which of these two roles have I tried to play?
Am I a builder who works with care,
Measuring life by the rule and square?
Am I shaping my deeds by a well-made plan,
Patiently doing the best I can?
Or am I a wrecker who walks the town,
Content with the labor of tearing down?
-- Unknown
[/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times]Wreckers or Builders . . . which are you?[/FONT]
I watched them tearing a building down,
A gang of men in a busy town.
With a ho-heave-ho and lusty yell,
They swung a beam and a sidewall fell.
I asked the foreman, "Are these men skilled,
As the men you'd hire if you had to build?"
He gave me a laugh and said, "No indeed!
Just common labor is all I need.
I can easily wreck in a day or two
What builders have taken a year to do."
And I tho't to myself as I went my way,
Which of these two roles have I tried to play?
Am I a builder who works with care,
Measuring life by the rule and square?
Am I shaping my deeds by a well-made plan,
Patiently doing the best I can?
Or am I a wrecker who walks the town,
Content with the labor of tearing down?
-- Unknown
[/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Times]Wreckers or Builders . . . which are you?[/FONT]
Builder.
:homo:
You raised some good points there SRC. While I agree there are times that PMs may be good for dealing with some personal issues, I do believe that treating with it in open forum does have its advantages. It gives both sides to express themselves openly, and oftentimes too perhaps in a more respectable manner than if in private because they are aware that others are seeing it. Additionally, others may be able to impart some understanding and help to resolve the situation even better.
So yes, there is much to be said for treating with things in the open.
this is why
And as for the other .. I've only had 1 person rile me up enough at work for me to actually say something to them and yes I did do it in front of everyone else .. because if I hadn't .. it would have just continued because the other person was going behind my back saying little things here and there .. so no one knew exactly WHO to believe about the situation.
So I brought it out right there in front of everyone so everyone had the same story and was on the same page .. and the "gossip" about it was not different in every office.
There's no other way to do such a thing when so many people are invovled and talking in "private" behind each others back .. someone is always going to make it sound like they are so pitiful, when in actuality .. they 9 times out of 10 might be the culprit instead.
Everyone always thinks "they" are the one in the right .. and until both people have spoken in a public/peer oriented situation .. it's never going to be resolved.
I say hash it out in the open for everyone to enjoy!
negative