:homo: man that was hard to read.Great stuff, just wish you would have double spaced that
OK. It's come to my attention that...
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To be honest, I completely LOVE this forum! I think that V and the other Mods do what they can, when they can to keep the peace around here. But I also agree that when you have such a high level of newcomers, ESPECIALLY ones that jump in and start talking to people like they own the place, it gets very hard to keep the peace. We have to remember that this IS over the internet, so there is no way to base anything that is said on anything EXCEPT words IE: tone of voice, if the person is smiling when a comment is made, etc.
I've never had any problems here until just recently and frankly, I'm sick to damn death of all the fighting!! This used to be a place I would come to get away from the drama of real life, not where I'd come to listen to more!! It's really sad when I'd log on and see certain ones here, and log right back off. I've never had that problem here! I want OTz to be the place it was before, and if everyone is agreeable to that, it will happen!
I've never had any problems here until just recently and frankly, I'm sick to damn death of all the fighting!! This used to be a place I would come to get away from the drama of real life, not where I'd come to listen to more!! It's really sad when I'd log on and see certain ones here, and log right back off. I've never had that problem here! I want OTz to be the place it was before, and if everyone is agreeable to that, it will happen!
True Boxer. Some people here have come to this board lately, such as myself. We have been members of message boards for awhile. The main reason, although not the only reason, we ended up here is because we too were searching for the message board where the drama wasn't. I left the last board because of the posters there. They were allowed free run of the place. They could abuse you with any choice of words they wished to use, and that produced some comments that were down right disgusting. So I decided one day, enough is enough, and left. After a few days of not having a board to post on, I started searching the internet for a new place. I found a place called offtopic (not offtopicz) and that I'd see how that board was. Well as soon as I signed up, I realized you had to pay money to get an avatar or a signature, and even more money to be able to access other areas of the board. That was completely retarded in my opinion, so I left that site and continued searching.
It was then that I found this site. What appealed to me was the recent activity on a lot of different sub-forums, the laid back atmosphere I perceived from what I read on the general forum, and the ability to debate issues without the overwhelming majority being on one side of those fence. This site was exactly what I was looking for.
Everyone seemed so civil and accepting when I joined. It was like the perfect message board. But as I started to post, I found out that there were some people here that don't take too well to new people. That was ok since it happens at every board. I knew it would blow over once I stuck around for awhile. Well after six weeks here, they same people are still the same. It occurred to me that these people don't like not just because I'm new. But because I'm different. And I do act quite different than most people.
What I realize is that people need to step back and realize themselves that, just because others act different, have different opinions, or are different in other ways, it doesn't mean you can't get along with them. I understand that differences will more than likely hinder the ability to mesh nicely the first time you interact. Assumptions make you think the worst in different people. We just need to try an understand that no one here has ill intentions, and that we all do want to get along. We all want to make OffTopicz a great place for not only ourselves, but everyone else.
Ugh.. I've got the worst head cold I've had in ages. I'm sure there are parts in that which don't make sense. But I'm, sure you all get the overall picture.
It was then that I found this site. What appealed to me was the recent activity on a lot of different sub-forums, the laid back atmosphere I perceived from what I read on the general forum, and the ability to debate issues without the overwhelming majority being on one side of those fence. This site was exactly what I was looking for.
Everyone seemed so civil and accepting when I joined. It was like the perfect message board. But as I started to post, I found out that there were some people here that don't take too well to new people. That was ok since it happens at every board. I knew it would blow over once I stuck around for awhile. Well after six weeks here, they same people are still the same. It occurred to me that these people don't like not just because I'm new. But because I'm different. And I do act quite different than most people.
What I realize is that people need to step back and realize themselves that, just because others act different, have different opinions, or are different in other ways, it doesn't mean you can't get along with them. I understand that differences will more than likely hinder the ability to mesh nicely the first time you interact. Assumptions make you think the worst in different people. We just need to try an understand that no one here has ill intentions, and that we all do want to get along. We all want to make OffTopicz a great place for not only ourselves, but everyone else.
Ugh.. I've got the worst head cold I've had in ages. I'm sure there are parts in that which don't make sense. But I'm, sure you all get the overall picture.
I myself have personally never had an issue with you. You really don't post that much, and if you do, I must miss it! What upsets me is when a new person deliberately starts posting things that they know will start an argument with at least one other member. I've never had issues with any of the Mods, or the Admin, to be honest, I've never even had issues with any of the other members.....until now....
I don't consider myself an unreasonable person, I don't take jabs at other members on the sly, if I have an issue with you, you will most defiantly be the first one to know it! That's simply how I am! But I tend to get an attitude and let my emotions get the better of me when I see that someone is trying to bait me, and others, into fighting, ESPECIALLY when that person comes right out and says to me that's what they are doing!!
There are people here that are good friends, some that are in relationships with one another, some that are married, and some of us that hope to one day meet. We are all vastly different, but no one will hold that against you. No one will dislike you simply for being different. Lines of communication must have gotten crossed somehow or another with you and these other members. Ask around, people will tell you, I have a very straight-forward way about me. I say what I have to say and that's that, but I never put others down while doing so. And I don't like to see others do it either.
yeah I've been whiteness to mod favoritism. its sort of funny.
post more in the political/philosophy forums, it happens all the time.
ive just seen this.i find the staff here very fair.ive been supported by them and ive been warned by them..whats fairer than that?
This is what I'm talking about when I say differences. You may think that person is baiting you, but they aren't. It's all about perceptions. And when you perceive someone's intention wrongly, it will obviously create a feud between you two. And it's a feud that you both had no intentions of creating. This is common with new people interacting. Both parties need to understand this, and then I'm sure we can all get along.
I understand what you are saying, and I agree that people can get confused and upset over something that was a misunderstanding, but when someone negative reps you and INTENTIONALLY baits you by saying "BTW, you should see what so and so had to say about you in a PM" then THAT is DEFINITELY baiting someone, am I correct??
I don't intentionally set out thinking the worst of people, I accept EVERYONE here, until you give me reasons not to! And even then I try to be the bigger person and let things slide, until I just cannot take it anymore.
I don't intentionally set out thinking the worst of people, I accept EVERYONE here, until you give me reasons not to! And even then I try to be the bigger person and let things slide, until I just cannot take it anymore.
I wouldn't call that baiting since, as far as I'm aware, that happened after then initial misunderstanding, and after both had already taken jabs at each other. Also I'm aware that each have taken equally as bad jabs at each other. Both need to make an effort to be civil towards each other, or that's not possible, then both need to simply leave each other alone completely.
That wasn't the initial start of bad feelings towards each other, no. I only got defensive towards this person AFTER I had watched her attack more than one member here in an equally spiteful way....but that's neither here nor there....
I understand what you mean, however, not all of us are as mature as we should be, and sadly, until a certain level of maturity is reached by all here, we shall continue to have disagreements, but I've just never seen things as bad as they have been the last few days, and it's quite upsetting.
I understand what you mean, however, not all of us are as mature as we should be, and sadly, until a certain level of maturity is reached by all here, we shall continue to have disagreements, but I've just never seen things as bad as they have been the last few days, and it's quite upsetting.
Again, this is the misperception I'm talking about.
In the case you have brought up. Both parties are being as mature as each other. Both are doing the same things to each other.
Both need to drop it.
i would agree with some of this statement...you and i have had disagreement due to misunderstandings and you were once big enough to say..."im an arse deb" to me..but recently there have been some very sad and nasty posts here especially in some threads.
i have seen this forum at its best..this before you joined ,and sadly recently i have seen it at its worst.
i have for a few days used my block on a members posts ..and it has made a huge difference to the feeling of the forum again,i think this indicates that there is bad feeling and bitchiness because as soon as i couldnt see it ,it was gone.
again to your initail statement.. i feel that all mods are fair and behave accordingly even in matters in which thay may not be enthusiastic,as i said before i have been supported and reprimanded..how fair is that?
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