Mrs Behavin
Well-Known Member
Whether a man winds up with a nest egg, or a goose egg, depends alot on the
kind of chick he marries.
Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earnin' his salt,
that he forgets his sugar.
Too many couples marry for better, or for worse, but not for good.
When a man marries a woman, they become one; but the trouble starts when
they try to decide which one.
When a man has enough horse sense to treat his wife like a thoroughbred,
she will never turn into an old nag.
On anniversaries, the wise husband always forgets the past -but never the
present.
A foolish husband says to his wife, "Honey, you stick to the washin'
ironin', cookin', and scrubbin'. No wife of mine is gonna work."
The bonds of matrimony are a good investment, only when the interest is
kept up.
Many girls like to marry a military man - he can cook, sew, and make beds,
and is in good health, and he's already used to taking orders.
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age, and
start bragging about it.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know
"why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads
weren't paved.
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth....
Remember about Algebra.
You know you are getting old, when everything either dries up, or leaks..
I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a
nice change from being young.
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they
don't recognize you.
If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at
when you are old.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up
your zipper, but it's really worse when you forget to pull it down.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks , it was called
witchcraft........Today, it's called Golf.
He who laughs, lasts.
I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I
can ask where I left my glasses.
I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
If I knew I was going to get this old, I would have taken better care of
myself when I was young.
If you laugh a lot, when you get older your wrinkles will be in the right
places.
Middle age is when you burn the midnight oil around 9:00 PM.
My grandson asked me if I still look at young women - I said yes, but I
can't remember why.
My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill.
The big thing today is computer dating. If you don't know how to run a
computer it really dates you.
The golden years: When actions creak louder than words.
There's nothing wrong with the younger generation that twenty years or so
won't cure.
When did my wild oats turn to prunes and all-bran?
The older you get, the better you get, (unless you're a banana).
kind of chick he marries.
Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earnin' his salt,
that he forgets his sugar.
Too many couples marry for better, or for worse, but not for good.
When a man marries a woman, they become one; but the trouble starts when
they try to decide which one.
When a man has enough horse sense to treat his wife like a thoroughbred,
she will never turn into an old nag.
On anniversaries, the wise husband always forgets the past -but never the
present.
A foolish husband says to his wife, "Honey, you stick to the washin'
ironin', cookin', and scrubbin'. No wife of mine is gonna work."
The bonds of matrimony are a good investment, only when the interest is
kept up.
Many girls like to marry a military man - he can cook, sew, and make beds,
and is in good health, and he's already used to taking orders.
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age, and
start bragging about it.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know
"why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads
weren't paved.
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth....
Remember about Algebra.
You know you are getting old, when everything either dries up, or leaks..
I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a
nice change from being young.
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they
don't recognize you.
If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at
when you are old.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up
your zipper, but it's really worse when you forget to pull it down.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks , it was called
witchcraft........Today, it's called Golf.
He who laughs, lasts.
I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I
can ask where I left my glasses.
I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
If I knew I was going to get this old, I would have taken better care of
myself when I was young.
If you laugh a lot, when you get older your wrinkles will be in the right
places.
Middle age is when you burn the midnight oil around 9:00 PM.
My grandson asked me if I still look at young women - I said yes, but I
can't remember why.
My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill.
The big thing today is computer dating. If you don't know how to run a
computer it really dates you.
The golden years: When actions creak louder than words.
There's nothing wrong with the younger generation that twenty years or so
won't cure.
When did my wild oats turn to prunes and all-bran?
The older you get, the better you get, (unless you're a banana).
