what are your limits?

[BreakfastSurreal]

when you are dating someone, what is your jealousy limit? a hug? a kiss on the cheek? touching of any sort?
I hug other guys around my bf all the time, i dont really think its a big deal...i dont have many guy friends that i am fond of enough to kiss on the cheek really, but if i did then i would and he wouldn't get mad. As for me, I am a little more jealous than he is...he doesn't really have any girl friends so the issue has never come up, but if it was someone i didnt know and he hugged them then i might get jealous a little bit...if it was a mutual friend of ours then i wouldn't care. Sometimes I like it when girls hit on my bf...I kinda take it as a compliment to me...since I know he'd never do anything with them. Once we were at a party and he was DJing, and these girls just couldn't get enough of him. After he was done they went up and talked to him, and of course I wanted to hear what they had to say so I kinda just stood near them and acted like I wasn't paying attention. After a min he pulled me over and introduced me to them and they were really sweet, but it was so funny how you could tell they thought he was the best thing since sliced bread. It just made me feel better about being with him I guess lol.

 

[Maritxu]

I don't think a kiss on the cheek or a hig are bad. I am myself, a very affectionate person anyway.
I don't like the flirting though, at least not in front of me. Once I was going in the metro and this girl was like having an orgasm when she saw him. Then she wanted to touch him all over. He even felt raped. I was like: "what's up?" and she went away running. I don't think I have ever been more jealous.
With this I mean (I got myself lost) is that I trust him, so if I fear someone, is the other girls....
Anyway, I tend to get a lot more jealous if he speaks about one of his ex. That's the worst idea he can have

 

[TheOriginalJames]

I'd pay a guy to have sex with my girlfriend if I can tape it.

j/p

 

[BreakfastSurreal]

I'd pay a guy to have sex with my girlfriend if I can tape it.

j/p

speaking of....this one time my bf and i were pretty messed up and he was kissing me and he told me "you know what would be really hot?" and i said "what??" and he said "if i could watch another man f*ck you"...that REALLY honestly creeped me out. I really have no desire to be with any man other than him. It also creeped me out because we had a friend over at the time, his best guy friend, and i was really hoping he wasnt insinuating that he wanted me to have sex with billy...billy is like a brother to me ive known him for 7 years...i said "youre not talking about billy are you??" and he said no..thank god. I tried to bring it up and joke with him about it a week later and he acted like he never said that...haha...

 

[TheOriginalJames]

i was just kidding. I don't want my hand to cheat on me.

 

[White2000GT]

I think about the time that she pops me in the back of the head.... that's when I would know that she is jealous. And that's as good a place as any to go ahead and stop flirting. But luckily for me she isn't the jealous type.
Me on the other hand. Well, I try not to be jealous. And I have no reason to be with her. But with my ex wife... She was a bit of a flirt. Let's just say I have had times where the rage inside me would boil over. Never a good thing.
I'm better at controlling jealousy, but I am fiercely protective of my baby. But that's different.

 

[Darkstar]

i have no hang ups on physical contact when it comes to my boyfriend. Ive been a pretty experimental person, and i have no qualms about my boyfriend fooling around, as long as i am there to witness it. Of course i participate too. Its strictly physical, i have no worries about straying emotions.

Of course i would never expect it to be equal. No guy is that damn trusting.

 

[Butterfly]

Umm, I don't think I am jealous at all

Hubby is dating someone, and so am I

 

[BreakfastSurreal]

Umm, I don't think I am jealous at all

Hubby is dating someone, and so am I

wow...so what exactly the point of dating other people? I can see the point of swinging is to have sex...but if you are actually dating someone else...well...why would you do that? isn't the point of dating to find the right person? Are you still looking for the right person?

 

[SloMoFo]

wow...so what exactly the point of dating other people? I can see the point of swinging is to have sex...but if you are actually dating someone else...well...why would you do that? isn't the point of dating to find the right person? Are you still looking for the right person?

yea I don't get that either

 

[Kat]

I can handle him flirting with other girls since he does this at work...even with the ladies that are old enough to be his mom...thats just the kind of guy he is...he jokes around a lot... he always tells me about it tho...thats the only reason I know it happens...If a girl hugs my bf...I can stand that...and maybe even the quick peck on the cheek thing... A bartender at a place me and him used to go would occasionaly do that (the peck...me and her were kinda friends) ... As far as anything else...I have a nasty temper...I can't help being jealous...I dont want anyone else actually kissing my bf or touching him in any way...I guess I also do have to add that it depends on the girl hugging him too tho....if I know that she likes him and doesnt respect me....then I dont think so...

Though I never have to worry about any of this since we actually talk about it...he knows how I feel and respects it...besides that I know he respects me too.

(he's the same way though...if not worse...he'll be ok with me hugging a guy friend...but no way in hell would I be able to get a quick peck...or give...unless its family...not like I would tho)

 

[bakagan]

I can handle him flirting with other girls since he does this at work...even with the ladies that are old enough to be his mom...thats just the kind of guy he is...he jokes around a lot... he always tells me about it tho...thats the only reason I know it happens...If a girl hugs my bf...I can stand that...and maybe even the quick peck on the cheek thing... A bartender at a place me and him used to go would occasionaly do that (the peck...me and her were kinda friends) ... As far as anything else...I have a nasty temper...I can't help being jealous...I dont want anyone else actually kissing my bf or touching him in any way...I guess I also do have to add that it depends on the girl hugging him too tho....if I know that she likes him and doesnt respect me....then I dont think so...

Though I never have to worry about any of this since we actually talk about it...he knows how I feel and respects it...besides that I know he respects me too.

(he's the same way though...if not worse...he'll be ok with me hugging a guy friend...but no way in hell would I be able to get a quick peck...or give...unless its family...not like I would tho)

whats your stance on if a gay man flirted with your bf?

 

[andcuriouser]

Yeah, Brandi? What if I decided your boy is yummy scrumbos?

 

[Kat]

Yeah, Brandi? What if I decided your boy is yummy scrumbos?

ummm...well only since its you I guess that'd be ok

In all honesty if that happened that'd be fine by me....I think its a compliment...if a guy seconds my opinion on thinking my bf is cute/sexy/yummy whatever you wanna say

 

[Rusteh]

i think that whole swinging topic has already been discussed in another thread...but as for limitations...i'm a pretty jealous guy but I play it off with a joke or two and don't get upset at very much...it has to be blantanly obvious for me to catch on I guess.

 

[trope]

I'd say I have pretty loose limits. I trust Leland very much, so I don't care if (for example, because this has actually happened) he sleeps in the same bed as another gay guy. I'm not worried. We joke around a lot, but I might get upset if he kissed another person for real. Like, I don't mind a peck on the mouth or something. But more than a peck? No way.

 

[MichaelE]

I'm completely fine with hugs, kisses on cheek, and that sort of stuff... even an occassional dance with a friend of hers who's a guy as long as it's not something intimate (her grinding with someone else is a big HELL NO - lol)

But the thing is, I only date "good girls" so I usually have nothing to worry about - and when I do date "party girls" I already know what to expect so it doesn't bother me... cause I'll do the same thing with other girls in that case!

So yeah, the best defense to prevent jealousy is a good offense: find a significant other who's a kind-hearted, sweet person that you don't have to worry about.