Uh uh....hands off!

[Mrs Behavin]

This guy is sitting at the end of the bar looking gloomy. His friend arrives and sits down beside him. "Why so glum, chum?" he asks his sad friend.

"Oh, its my wife, she beats me at everything we compete at. Jogging, bowling, tennis, cards ... just everything."

The friend orders a beer and pauses to think. "I know," he exclaims, "Challenge her to a pissing contest."

"A pissing contest?"

"Surely you can out distance her on that ... do it on the front lawn so you can see the difference."

"Ok, I'll do it."

So he goes home and says to his wife, "I challenge you to distance pissing contest. We'll meet on the front lawn after dark."

So they each prepare themselves drinking lots of beverage prior to the contest. After dark they meet and the husband suggests the wife go first. So she drops her drawers and lets out with a modest shower.

Hubby steps up, drops his drawers, and grabs his 'equipment'.

His wife says, ... "Ah, no, dear. No hands allowed.":tongue:

 

[Charmer]

I know a way he could win without hands, but I don't know if I could explain it clear enough using "tame" language.

Let's see....if he masturbated beforehand and drank a few cups of coffee, but didn't go to the bathroom; then when he went outside, he should be thinking of something sexual stimulating. I think the "equipment" could do the holding-up by itself and then he can let it rip.

I can understand what I wrote, but do you get the picture? Hey, it's written from personal experience!

 

[NicAuf]

Gross lol

 

[Homer]

lol keep them coming .

 

[Darkstar]

I know a way he could win without hands, but I don't know if I could explain it clear enough using "tame" language.

Let's see....if he masturbated beforehand and drank a few cups of coffee, but didn't go to the bathroom; then when he went outside, he should be thinking of something sexual stimulating. I think the "equipment" could do the holding-up by itself and then he can let it rip.

I can understand what I wrote, but do you get the picture? Hey, it's written from personal experience!

that could have been left out, lol

 

[Peter Parka]

Hmmm....good joke I guess though that explanation was, well, hmmm...

 

[AUDRAA]

TMI Charmer

 

[Tim]

You can't pee when you have a woody!

 

[Veronica]

haha!!

 

[Charmer]

that could have been left out, lol

SORRY!

Hmmm....good joke I guess though that explanation was, well, hmmm...

SORRY!

TMI Charmer

SORRY!

You can't pee when you have a woody!

Uh, yes you can! Remember? "...personal experience!"

haha!!

If that's for the original post Amy posted, I won't say anything!

If that's for my post, I now feel soooooo embarassed!