Mrs Behavin
Well-Known Member
Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.
Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"
Southern women have a distinct way with fond
expressions :
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can."
"How's your Momma?"
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know the joys of June, July, and
August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their
hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's
homemade jelly
Southern women know their cities dripping with
Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna
Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a
hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH"
them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard
greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the
general direction
of "yonder."
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly"
is, as in: "Going to town,
be back directly."
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is
not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a
pretty little bowl in the middle
of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.
They might not use the term,
but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best
gesture of solace for a
neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried
chicken and a big bowl of
cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a
real crisis, they also know
to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference
between "right near" and "a
right far piece." They also know that "just down the
road" can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the
difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car
with the flashing turn signal
is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a
noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in
lines, ... and when we're "in
line," . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will
discover they're related,
even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is
plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat
them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon,
grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a
breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself
lookin'," you know you are in
the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet
milk." Sweet tea indicates the
need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our
tea unsweetened. "Sweet
milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream
obscenities at little old ladies
who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless
her heart" ... and go your
own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed
by your Southerness: Take
two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and
call me in the morning. Bless
your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time
understanding all this
Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they
are fixin' to have classes
on Southernness as a second language!
And for those that are not from the South but have
lived here for a long time,
all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch
that reads "I ain't from
the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends
are fahevah !
Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was
raised in the South or wish they
had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little
heart, fake it.
We know you got here as fast as you could
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.
Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"
Southern women have a distinct way with fond
expressions :
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can."
"How's your Momma?"
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know the joys of June, July, and
August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their
hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's
homemade jelly
Southern women know their cities dripping with
Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna
Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a
hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH"
them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard
greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the
general direction
of "yonder."
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly"
is, as in: "Going to town,
be back directly."
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is
not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a
pretty little bowl in the middle
of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.
They might not use the term,
but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best
gesture of solace for a
neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried
chicken and a big bowl of
cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a
real crisis, they also know
to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference
between "right near" and "a
right far piece." They also know that "just down the
road" can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the
difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car
with the flashing turn signal
is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a
noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in
lines, ... and when we're "in
line," . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will
discover they're related,
even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is
plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat
them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon,
grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a
breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself
lookin'," you know you are in
the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet
milk." Sweet tea indicates the
need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our
tea unsweetened. "Sweet
milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream
obscenities at little old ladies
who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless
her heart" ... and go your
own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed
by your Southerness: Take
two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and
call me in the morning. Bless
your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time
understanding all this
Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they
are fixin' to have classes
on Southernness as a second language!
And for those that are not from the South but have
lived here for a long time,
all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch
that reads "I ain't from
the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends
are fahevah !
Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was
raised in the South or wish they
had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little
heart, fake it.
We know you got here as fast as you could
