Sometimes I just want to strangle people

[Kat]

Yeah so my sisters kids dad (they just recently kinda split up) ...so anyways yeah he told her yesterday that he wants the kids...and if he cant have them then he doesnt want to see them at all... I would so love to kick his ass right now... How can he be so selfish... my nephew is 4 years old and my neice is 4 months ...they are precious kids... my sisters choice to be the one to keep them is also based mainly on the fact that he would not be the right person to keep them...considering he is here illegally...and still doesnt really speak english...she would be the better and safer provider care taker of them....also he works a lot more than she does... even works weekends so he wouldnt be around enough for them...they would be left with his sister-in-law until he got out of work at around 10 pm every night

But still HOW CAN HE SAY HE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH THEM ... just cause he doesnt get his way
...also heres a picture of each of them so you can see what he'd be missing out on


my adorable neice


and the cutie nephew


it breaks my heart to see how their dad is acting now...I just dont understand it

 

[hhayes]

damn what an asshole. beautiful kids. his loss.

 

[Mrs Behavin]

What a jerk! I can someone just say that they dont ever want anything to do with their own flesh and blood!
Adorbale kids!

 

[Veronica]

Very cute kids. If he doesnt want no part of them, then his loss. But she better make him sign papers or something showing that he cant just come out of nowhere and take the kids. If he is an illegal "alien"... report him.

Is he violent at all? If so, he doesnt need to be around the kids anyways.

 

[Kat]

he's not violent so no worries there...no real reason to report him...besides he knows a lot of people would be after him if he tried any of that sh!t... especially on top of that list would be me, my mom, and my bf ...I just wish he wasnt being so stupid

 

[BaggedSplash]

no reason to report him?? HELLO!! hes ILLEGAL!! he shouldnt be here in this country. illegal immigrants get no sympathy from me no matter what...

 

[TheOriginalJames]

no reason to report him?? HELLO!! hes ILLEGAL!! he shouldnt be here in this country. illegal immigrants get no sympathy from me no matter what...

Technically he's not an illegal anymore if he has a blood American born child here.

 

[Kat]

sorry BDN but I have to disagree with you on some points... I really dont think reporting him would be good for my neice and nephew... besides I do respect him in some ways...he does work his ass off to save money to get his family here legally...he's already brought his 2 brothers over and is now working on his parents... and actually he's working with the immagration office on his own behalf right now too...its just a long process


plus james is right...he is technically in most ways legal because of the kids...its just a matter of crossing the t's and dotting the i's .... tho like I said its still a long process

 

[Veronica]

Well if he is a good person, How come they cant work out visitation? Some guys want ALL the cake and Eat it ALL too. Its just not right. I understand why you wouldnt want to report him because of your neices and nephews. He just needs a wake up call.

 

[Kat]

Well if he is a good person, How come they cant work out visitation? Some guys want ALL the cake and Eat it ALL too. Its just not right. I understand why you wouldnt want to report him because of your neices and nephews. He just needs a wake up call.

thats what I dont get...she has no problem with him seeing them as much as he wants... besides he's currently still living with my sister ( he still hasnt found his own apt.) ... but even after he moves out she's ok with him seeing them whenever he has the time...she just wants them to be with her full time

 

[White2000GT]

See, part of me wants to take his side. And I'll explain why. I'm a divorced parent of three. I have only been able to see my kids for a total of 9 days in the last almost two years. That was not by choice either. Now, when I say part of me wants to take his side, I'm not saying that I agree with what he's doing. Quite to opposite. I'm saying that because in most all divorce cases the mother ends up with custody of the child, receiving child support, gets to claim the kids on her income taxes, and so on, and so on. What does the father end up with in most cases? Kids who feel he abandoned them, money sent every month in child support that he can only assume the mother is using for the kids and not for herself... and in my case, on top of the $1200 a month I pay her for child support, the $1500 plane ticket, $250 rental car and and $200 hotel costs just to see my kids for 4 days. Then, the same thing minus the rental car and hotel (I stayed with my sister and drove her car the second time around) just to see them for 5 days. Keep in mind that not every divorced dad is a deadbeat dad. Some of us pay our child support with no questions asked and do whatever it takes to get to spend every bit of time possible with our kids. But sometimes the mothers just don't go out of their way to make it very easy for us.
Now, in this guy's case I can't really think of any reason why he would want custody of the kids other than for financial gain. In other words, to make it easier for him to move all his brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles and cousins into the States. I won't go there though out of respect for you Kat. And along those lines, the same reason why he would say that he wants nothing to do with them if she gets custody of them (which will be the case given his status).
So, yes, he is an asshole and no, he doesn't deserve to get custody of the kids. But in some cases (not this one, but definitely in mine) it is the mother, not the father, that "wants the cake and eat it too". All I want to do is stay a positive influence in my kids' lives. I don't think that's asking for too much.

 

[Maritxu]

What an asshole! If I was your sister I'd be glad he doesn't want to see them. The kids deserve a better dad!