School Bullying

[Veronica]

Autism Has My Child Has Just Posted the Following:

I work at the local Sheriffs Office and have seen and heard of all types of bullying.* I’ve*just never had to deal with it, personally,*before.* I’ve*tried to prepare my son for it, but I don’t*think you can ever get fully prepared.* I don’t*believe any mother or father wants their child to be picked on.**I just [...]

Click here to view the article.

 

[Veronica]

hey, yall read this.. i a, still pissed over this

 

[robdawg1]

To often parents take the stance of "kids will be kids" and they ignore the issue...to the detriment of the child. This is alot of what causes people to snap and rampage like we have seen time and again, and if we as adults would make it safer for kids who are bullied to approach us and fight there aggressors, we would see alot less of the issues that result. Those of you who say that " I was bullied as a child, and i didnt shoot up a school" well me too. I also had a family who supported me, and paid attention to me when needed them to. I am not for excusing anyone from their behavior, but i do want to stop these things before they happen.

 

[robdawg1]

Good looking out V!! Way to take a stand!

 

[Dana]

I am sorry you have to deal with that. I've been bullied in my life but I had a strong enough backbone where I never took it sitting down; so I cannot fathom those who just sit and take it. It must be hard on them and I blame the parents for not teaching kids that this is not acceptable but these are the same parents who probably talk down to others and talk behind peoples backs and crack inappropriate jokes at others expense; the ones who swear up a storm in front of their children and think nothing is wrong with it. I did have a slight chuckle though at Austin cracking unfunny jokes I think thats just a part of childhood, what we found funny as a kid isn't as funny as adults. My cousins little girl who is 10 does the same thing and shes perfectly normal.

 

[AUFred]

Some kids build themselves up by tearing down others. I was a victim of bullying because growing up I was always small for my age. My mother did like you did but even that was not enough until I threatened to take a guy's head off for him and a coach stepped in. Another time a bully and I ended up in front of a judge.

 

[darkcgi]

I dealt with being bullied till about 4th grade
but that is just after I started Karate
It wasn't the fighting I was taught it was the self confidence.
I have a 13 yr old that is being verbally bullied in school.
I turned into the come to guy to get help with bullying from 5th grade and on.

Basically that bulling gives the kids doubt about themselves and anger towards other kids.
A lot of the times the bully is being bullied at home.

 

[hart]

The scary thing is some of the kids being bullied are exactly the ones the turn into the kind of kids that end up coming back to the schools later and shooting up the schools. Now, Veronica, I in no way am suggesting Austin will do this. What I am suggesting is this type of situation PLANTS THE SEEDS of such a scenario. Austin has the support, understanding of a loving mother, the resources of people who are trained in helping him, and he has a sweet disposition. What I am saying is the experiences one has that don't get addressed can mold someone later in life to act out.

 

[Veronica]

Yes, I agree with that. If a situation ISNT addressed, it does cause harm later in life.

I try to tame all situations. Unfortunately for austin, he doesnt understand people well. He thinks when people are making fun of him that they are his friends. He doesnt quiet understand that they are really out to hurt him or cause him harm. The could tell him to go fart next to someone and he would do that to get their approval, not knowing that it would really be them trying to get him in trouble or get more people to make fun of him. KNow what I mean? He doesnt have the understanding of a normal child.

I was bullied by my sister growing up. (normal for a family). I didnt get it at school, BUT I did follow the crowd and made fun of a girl once. I appoligized to her a year later because I felt SO bad about it. It wasnt right for anyone to do that and I shouldnt of followed the crowd. I have taught my boys that they do NOT follow crowds... Instead, they should be the leaders. Jacob is a good example of that. Because of how good he is with people, Teachers always put disabled kids with him because they know he wont let anything go wrong with them. And he is very popular (especially with the girls LOL).

I still cant get over that kid calling me fat! I so wanted to go to that room and snatch his ass up! LOL And im sure that if austin would just knock their asses out, it would be over, but he wont do that.

dana, yea, he is SOOO NOT FUNNY! LOL He tries sooo hard tho. But hes just not funny. hahahah. Poor little man. lol

 

[Roxi]

This has been going on for years, my opinion there isn't a form of punishment implemented in schools that would ever stop it.
Parents are to lazy to punish there children for being a bully either as the ones that don't have to deal with a distraught child coming home in tears or dreading going back to school daily.

Veronica all you can do is what you are doing and pray one day Austin will become immune to it and ignore them. You keep taking a stand and letting the school know it's unacceptable and hope they take stronger measures.

When I first started school I got picked on cause the tendon in one of my eyes was not growing so I was cross eyed other got worse and when I was 7 I had surgery to correct it, but had to wser glasses not cause I can't see but after a certain amount of time my bad eye as other didn't develope as quick as the other the tendon gets tired and everything goes blurry. But I made the best of it and it stopped bothering me but I changed schools just as I hit secondary school (high school) and as I was the new kid and everyone else had known each other for years I was a easy target at first year it bothered me, then I just started getting pissed off and got kind of violent and would get into fights to the point that 90% of the people in my school older other younger wouldn't pick on me as o had no problem punching them out which is not what I want Custin to do but by the middle I just ignored it made friends graduated and never looked back.
But you also need to let him figure out his own way to deal with it, he will eventually figure out how to ignore them and make friends that will be there for him and have his back and for him to focus his attention on. I know it's horrible but you can't work yourself up over it either the more upset you get by it the more he will get upset aswell he is going to feed off your reactions so yeah be angry but calm.

 

[Veronica]

yea, see with him, he has no true friends. When we moved, he left everything he knew. So he started over and all his old friends are gone. I think it was a mistake to move.

 

[Roxi]

Moving wasn't a mistake V. He WILL find a friend or friends or a group of people to hang with it just takes time and I do understand he is different in aspects and when I say I understand I really do not from a parent point of view but family my eldest cousin is Austisic she honestly sounds a lot like Austin when she was younger to. She doesn't understand sarcasm or people making fun of her she was bullied for years and it was a lot worse than being called names to. She doesn't understand her body very well and back when we were kids and she was a early teen she didn't understand the concept of urinating you know what I mean the urge to go or whatever and she would wet herself and then other would hit that it was time for the bathroom so people at school would seriously fill water balloons with pee and throw them at her one boy went to the extent of pretending to play hide and seek and while she was counting stood on a wall and peed on her head. HOWEVER it took one act of kindness from one person and she made a friend for life. Even her sister myself and my sister introduced her to our friends and now V she has so many friends.
She still doesn't get certain things like you said like when people are out to hurt him and he thinks they are playing or that anger doesn't solve problems as she has a wicked temper she is 32 still can't tell the time BUT Veronica she is currently nearly 8months pregnant living with her soon to be husband whom she met through friends and she is going to make an amazing mum.

Like I said I don't know through a parents eyes but I took care of my cousin so did her friends she made all hope is not lost and I know Autism doesn't go away but they learn like any other people and he will eventually figure out how to open up and let people see him for the beautiful person he is. My aunt always made stupid comments about putting her in bubble wrap but my uncle let her shine by helping to figure it out in her own time, just cause Austin doesn't understand right now doesn't mean he never will and if it takes an act of cruelty for someone to be hos right hand man or girl focus on that ok.

 

[Veronica]

THank you ROXI! Thank you! seriously. I needed to hear that. I need to hear how it will be ok. That kids like him turn out fine. Makes me happy.

All i can do is what i am doing and pray it works out. And just hope that i give him the best I can.

 

[Roxi]

You are an amazing Mum you do so much and ask for nothing but the love of your family and the respect Austin deserves and for that you should be proud of yourself. He is still young but in years to come you will look at this and see how much he has progressed and grown and that will make you ever more proud. Chin uo girl. Screw those kids they don't know what they are kissing out on.
You got my number if you need a chat you can always use it.

 

[Veronica]

thanks so much!