House MD Fanfic

[HouseOvaries]

I write a few fanfics in my time about House MD. Here's one of them that I know House fans will enjoy:

Title: Vacation Plans
Character Group: Everyone from the show
Rated: M (Mature)



*The clock ticks in House's bedroom and the alarm goes off*

House: Son of a...Coma guy! I'm late for work! *puts on his slippers and goes to work in his pajamas*

Cuddy: House?! Why are you in pajamas? Go back home and ge...
House: Shuddup! Bad morning...where's our patient?
Cuddy: West wing...your hair. It...looks...bad. *Cuddy laughs hysterically*
House: Oh whatever... *he gives her a serious face*
Cuddy: Anyways, good day to you "Wildhair House". *she laughs again and walks off*

*House walks in the white board room and notice that the place is empty*

House: Cuddy...where is everyone? I'm not in the mood for your crappy games!
Wilson: They took the week off House...oh yeah, coupon cutting tonight around 7pm.
House: Aaaahhh!!! Where the hell did you come from? And to the coupon cutting reference...you silly goose. *gives a goofy laugh*
Wilson: I was just coming from breakfast in the cafeteria...the rest of your team actually went to Hawaii for vacation for a week. You didn't get the memo?
House: NOOOooo...how would I? Moron.
Wilson: You were shopping for clothes in Victoria's Secret. You may call me a moron, but you're the weirdo in this relationship. *he laughs at House*
House: I was not shopping, just browsing through in my travels. *he shrugs*
Wilson: You lie! Haha, well yeah they got you, me, and Cuddy a ticket. Let the secretaries at the front desk know you're taking leave and they'll get some replacement diagnosticians to operate on your patient. Relax dude...lets get packing!
House: Okay, whatever you say...my little coupon cutter. *gives Wilson a grin and laughs*

*They both leave with Cuddy and get packing for the trip to Hawaii* *Meanwhile, replacement diagnosticians take good care of the patient*

Wilson: Hector, you be a good boy now. You hear me?! * he smiles*
Hector: *barks*
Wilson: Later hun... *he leaves his house*

*Wilson meets up with House and Cuddy at the harbor boarding station for the ship*

Cuddy: House?! Hot doggie...nice Hawaiian shirt!
House: Thanks short-skirted mommy...your cleavage is nice, as well. *he smiles evily*
Wilson: Hey Cuddy! House is taken, remember?
Cuddy: I forgot Wilson...you two are committed to each other. *she gives the 'pfft whatever' look and gives the man the tickets at the entrance*

House: Nice seats...I wonder if I put a whoopie cushion under one of the chairs and see if somebody falls for it.
Wilson: You and your antics...never ceases to amaze me.
Cuddy: Red wine, please!

*Waitress gets them all drinks*

House: Cuddy...what are you doing?
Cuddy: Why are you whispering?
House: Because Wilson is present in the room...we can't get shaggy with it with my "ex-bf" in the room. *he winks*
Cuddy: Oh...right.
Wilson: What? What happened?

*House and Cuddy just laugh at Wilson*

Wilson: Do I have spaghetti sauce on my face? Huh?
House: And you told me to have pizza with a friend...if you're spilling sauce on your face, then I don't think I'll choose you as a friend to get pizza. *he laughs at Wilson*
Wilson: Hmph...not funny. *he looks away mad*

*House whispers to Cuddy something about Wilson*

House: Now you see why I call him my ex-boyfriend...he's a crybaby.
Cuddy: I can tell...what an embarassment in public!
House: I know, right.
Wilson: What the hell, House? You just broke up with me cuz you dislike my coupon cutting and I can't be committed with you in a long-term relationship! *he breathes heavily*

*the sailor captian and waiters/waitresses stare at them, especially Wilson*

Waiter: Are we gonna have to set up a slow dance party for a guy?
Wilson: Don't push my buttons waiter, get my food ASAP. *he is furious*
House: Don't worry waiter, he gets like this when his spanish tivos get erased.
Wilson: It was the finale!
House: See what I mean, waiter? Haha...

*They all cool down and enjoy their meals, except for House slurping his soup*

*About 5 hours pass and back at the hospital the replacement diagnosticians are handling the patient very efficiently*

House: I think we're almost there. Grab your things guys! Wilson, don't forget your magazines.
Wilson: Whatever House... *he shuffles past both of them and exits the ship*
Cuddy: I can't believe I hired a crybaby...I should make him work with Dr. Buffer back at the hospital.
House: Mean woman...but I love it. *he smiles*


*They exit the ship and head to the nearest lodge filled on the outside with coconuts and margaritas on the countertop*



To be continued...

 

[HouseOvaries]

Part 2 continued...

*House, Cuddy, and Wilson check in at the lodge and they get escorted to their resting area*

House: Hey look guys...it's baldy! I recognize that bald black head anywhere...hey Foreman!!! *he waves his arms and screams loudly*
Foreman: Hey there, House!
Cameron: Hi guys. Glad you could make it here with us so soon!
Chase: Yeah, I was playing Foreman in a game of Marco Polo in the ocean. I was Marco and he pulled down my swim trunks. Haha...
Cameron: What's with the magazines, Wilson? Shoes on sale?
Wilson: I'm not talking to anybody tonight. Maybe I'll feel better in the morning after some sleep.
Cuddy: Hush little baby, don't say a word!
House: You go girlfriend! *he high-fives Cuddy*

*Cuddy's cell phone rings and she answers it*

Cuddy: Hello...what is it?

*Back at the hospital they tell her great news*

Diagnostician: Everything is going great and we'll have her out in no time. Have fun guys.
Cuddy: Thanks for the update, sir. Thanks and goodbye. *she hangs up*
Foreman: What's the matter?
Cuddy: Nothing, the patient will be heading home soon enough. Now, lets forget about work and have fun.
House: I'm going skinny-dipping, who wants to join me?
Chase: I will House! I'm wearing a speedo.

*Wilson looks at Chase weird*

Wilson: House, I think someone is weirder than you.
House: No kidding...hey Chase? Are you really a homo?
Chase: I...I...I don't know what you're talking about.
Cameron: *she says nothing, but laughs*
Chase: Come on guys...it's just a speedo. We've all seen a man in short trunks before. Right?
Cameron: *she's now rolling on the floor laughing and is speechless at the moment*
Cuddy: Wow, um Chase? You need to get a tan, seriously. You're like a half-naked pale homo. *she laughs*
Chase: Whatever... *he looks away*

*They all go skinny-dipping, except for Wilson* *A woman in a hawaiian skirt walks over to Wilson*

Hawaiian Girl: What's the matter, sugar? No hoola hooping funtime today for a guy like you?
Wilson: I can't keep myself committed to the person I love. They just don't understand my feelings for them.
Hawaiian Girl: I see...who's your lover? Is it that lovely young woman over there? *points at Cuddy*
Wilson: Nope. That's my boss...we're on a vacation together. I'm with that guy over there. *points at House*
Hawaiian Girl: Whoa...there's a thing called, "crossing the line" and this would be exactly what I mean.
Wilson: I'm not gay...just wanna be long-time partners forever.
Hawaiian Girl: Well, then just forget him if he doesn't understand you. Lemme get you a lei and have a little "chat" later tonight. *she winks at him*
Wilson: Sure, that would be great! *he tells her to meet him at the same location around 9pm and she leaves*

*Meanwhile, House is doing tricks in the big pool outside of the big pool behind the Dining Lodge*

House: Look! I can do a cannonball naked!
Cameron: Wow House...since when does a cannonball have a huge "crack in it?
Cuddy: *laughs at Cameron's comment*
Foreman: Psssh...House, watch this dude! *he does a backwards flip and hits head on the diving board*
Chase: Ouch!
Cuddy: Oh dear...that's not good.

*They rush over to Foreman and see if he is okay*

Foreman: I'm fine. Just a minor cut on my head.
House: Correction...big black bald head that tells you peoples futures.
Foreman: House...show some respect.
House: Respect? What's the point...you're an idiot that can't even do a backflip! *he laughs at him*
Cuddy: *she laughs so much that she accidentally farts*
House: Cuddy...check your pants!
Cuddy: Whoops... *she laughs even more this time*
Cameron: So House...me and you in the cruise ship tonight, okay? *she winks at him*
House: Gotcha... *gives her the peace sign*

*They all head back to their resting area and House gets into comfy clothes to meet Cameron* *He sees her standing there outside the cruise ship a few feet from the resting area*

Cameron: Hey.
House: Hey.
Cameron: So.......it's been awhile. Hasn't it?
House: Yes...it has been.
Cameron: *she leans forward and kisses him on the lips*

*he kisses her back and they both walk onto the cruise ship*

House: Why are these beds he...
Cameron: Ssshhh...no talking. It's against the rules.
House: Oh yeah...but I forgot my whips and chains. Sorry. I can go get them if you wa...
Cameron: Shut up moron! Let me make out with you already!
House: And so the naughty little jackrabbit smooches all over the overly excited tiger...I love it! *he smiles*

*they make love on the cruise ship, then clean up themselves afterwards*

House: A walk on the beach, perhaps?
Cameron: Fine with me... *she smiles*

*They walk along the beach...hands clasped together*



To be continued...

 

[COOL_BREEZE2]

Hi House. What is a "Fanfic"? Is it like a script you yourself write based on the characters? I'm guessing so but not sure.

I myself have never seen the show. Don't think we get that. Is it one of the popular shows?

 

[HouseOvaries]

You answered your own question. And yes it's very popular...