Facing the End

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Minor Axis

Minor Axis

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As I approach 60 years of age (currently 56) I'm starting to see the end-of-life pattern as my and my wife's parents are approaching the jumping off point. I see anger in my Mom, that she can no longer live alone and is currently being forced to live with my brother and she has stated on many occasions she wants to die. As my wife's Dad nears the end with serious health issues, I see anger in her Mom, or maybe it is just denial or the beginning of acceptance that her husband is going to die.

So I wonder how do most people face the end of their lives? Is it with fear and anger or is it with acceptance and gratitude for being allowed to experience it? And that part of living your life is facing your death (ideally in bed, asleep)? Even I continue to think of the final reckoning as a long way off, but I hope when the time comes I can accept it calmly, not be paralyzed with fear, and enjoy those around me every minute that I can.

I realize that most of you young whipper-snappers don't even think about it. It's like something way beyond the horizon. You think it's a long way off, but as I was talking to my son about his Grandparents I had to remind him he was only 26 years behind me. When you think in terms of a lifetime, 26 years is not that much. :)
 
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Zorak

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Minor Axis said:
So I wonder how do most people face the end of their lives? Is it with fear and anger or is it with acceptance and gratitude for being allowed to experience it? And that part of living your life is facing your death (ideally in bed, asleep)? Even I continue to think of the final reckoning as a long way off, but I hope when the time comes I can accept it calmly, not be paralyzed with fear, and enjoy those around me every minute that I can.

I realize that most of you young wippersnappers don't even think about it. It's like something way beyond the horizon. You think it's a long way off, but as I was talking to my son about his Grandparents I had to remind him he was only 26 years behind me. When you think in terms of a lifetime, 26 years is not that much. :)
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As a whipper snapper, :D, I honestly believe I will live forever.

Actually, I think I am getting old, funny as that sounds.

I'm well aware of my own mortality, and if that isn't growing up, I don't know what is.
 
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LipzLikeMurder

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This is exactly why I hope I die in the thirties. Most ppl by 40 seem utterly and permanently depressed...unless they're clinically insane of course.
 
Laure

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I've got a plan. When I turn twenty nine, I'm just going to turn around and start going back again. :D Problem solved!
 
HottyToddyChick

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I look forward to 40. And 60. And 80.

Good Lord willing, I'll be able to see those milestones!

I know I am going to die. It's not a pleasant thought, but everyone dies. The first death that ever really shook me was my grandmother back in '08. I lucked out- I almost made it to 21 before someone close to me died. It upsets me that my dad no longer has a mother. It's too strange to wrap my mind around. I don't know what I'll do when my parents go. I can't even think about it. My own, no problem. Losing the people I love? It hurts too much to even consider.
 
hart

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I aint gonna tell you my age ;) but I do think of it. I keep seeing elderly people who physically are fine but have demethia or Alzheimer, etc., and I would rather be put on the proverberal ice float than be someone who doesn't have my brains (If I don't drink them all away by then).

I hate that in myself. I don't consider myself a prejudiced person, wasn't brought up that way, but when I see people who are mentally deficient, either emotionally or intellectually, it scares me!!

Pull my plug and give my parts away where they may be useful if I have brain damage so severe I need care. If I am so physically incompacitated life is not worth living, well, I'll take care of that, myself.
 
ClicheGuevara

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I just turned 29 and while that is not that old it still makes me think of my own mortality. I want to live well into my 80's 90's or 100's if I can do so mentally and as physically healthy as possible. I constantly think about what the future may have in store for me and I don't want to miss out on any of it.
 
Minor Axis

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Azazel: Great pic! LOL.

LipzLikeMurder said:
This is exactly why I hope I die in the thirties. Most ppl by 40 seem utterly and permanently depressed...unless they're clinically insane of course.
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Sounds like you'd be up for the Logan's Run method of population control. ;)

Laure said:
I've got a plan. When I turn twenty nine, I'm just going to turn around and start going back again. :D Problem solved!
Click to expand...

Actually you don't start reverting to a child until sometime after 80. :D

hart said:
I aint gonna tell you my age ;) but I do think of it. I keep seeing elderly people who physically are fine but have demethia or Alzheimer, etc., and I would rather be put on the proverberal ice float than be someone who doesn't have my brains (If I don't drink them all away by then).

I hate that in myself. I don't consider myself a prejudiced person, wasn't brought up that way, but when I see people who are mentally deficient, either emotionally or intellectually, it scares me!!

Pull my plug and give my parts away where they may be useful if I have brain damage so severe I need care. If I am so physically incompacitated life is not worth living, well, I'll take care of that, myself.
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Here's the thing. What turns people off is losing control, essentially losing their dignity, parked asleep in a wheel chair in the hallway of a nursing home. I've seen it recently (not me). There are those who would rather go out while they still have the ability to see how much worse it can get rather than waiting until they are helpless and wait for the end to come naturally. It can make for days, months, maybe years or bordom, and no real quality of life. I'm not an advocate of assisted suicide, but I understand the motivation especially if chronic pain is involved. Best case is to go from robust senior to dropping over dead...or in bed asleep or engaged in some adult activity, although that would not make your partner feel too good. ;)
 
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namratasnv

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What I feel is at the age of 40 you should keep all your worries and tensions aside and should go for a long drive or on a long holiday with our partner, enjoy the best moments of your life with your children and grand children.


These are the days, golden moments of your life, live it to the best.

Thanks
 
Iris

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Zorak said:
As a whipper snapper, :D, I honestly believe I will live forever.

Actually, I think I am getting old, funny as that sounds.

I'm well aware of my own mortality, and if that isn't growing up, I don't know what is.
Click to expand...

I'm a whipper snapper as well and I am very aware of my own mortality as well. I lost someone close to me last summer and it makes me think that I need to enjoy my life while i have it.
 
Minor Axis

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Iris said:
I'm a whipper snapper as well and I am very aware of my own mortality as well. I lost someone close to me last summer and it makes me think that I need to enjoy my life while i have it.
Click to expand...

Unless an event pulls your attention to it, people just don't think about it. And some of them step into traffic and surprise! ;)
 
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