SammyStephens
Well-Known Member
A Drunken Man sat at a bar stool barely able to keep atop of it. The bar tender noticed how intoxicated the man was and kept an eye on him, and sure enough the man spontaneously pukes all over the front of his own shirt and gets a very distressed look on his face. The drunk looks at the bartender in a sloppy scowl and proclaims "Myf wife eessh gunna keel me! I runed theeesh fine sheert!!" The bar tender walks ove rto the man says "No worries buddy, I have a trick for you, take a ten dollar bill, put it in your front shirt pocket and if your wife asks you what happened tell her some drunk puked on your shirt and gave you $10 for the dry cleaning." Satisfied with the advice the drunk ordered another drink.
Later that night the drunk came stumbling home, but in the doorway of his home he was confronted by his wife "You drunk son of a bitch!!!" She Yelled "You've been at the bar getting wasted all night, and LOOK!! You puked all over yourself!!! Disgusting!!!" The drunk defended himnself "Hey, I deed not do theesh, sheee a man puked on me and gave me ten dollars for dry cleaning!!!" The drunk pulls out a bill from his front pocket and hold it up to show his wife. The wife looks at him curiously and askes. "Honey, but that is a 20 dollar bill?" The drunk stares at the bill for a few moents till it comes into focus and sees that indeed it was a 20 dollar bill and not a ten. "Oh yeah!!" The drunk repllied, "He also shit my pants!!!"
Later that night the drunk came stumbling home, but in the doorway of his home he was confronted by his wife "You drunk son of a bitch!!!" She Yelled "You've been at the bar getting wasted all night, and LOOK!! You puked all over yourself!!! Disgusting!!!" The drunk defended himnself "Hey, I deed not do theesh, sheee a man puked on me and gave me ten dollars for dry cleaning!!!" The drunk pulls out a bill from his front pocket and hold it up to show his wife. The wife looks at him curiously and askes. "Honey, but that is a 20 dollar bill?" The drunk stares at the bill for a few moents till it comes into focus and sees that indeed it was a 20 dollar bill and not a ten. "Oh yeah!!" The drunk repllied, "He also shit my pants!!!"
