Do you spank ( or believe in ) the kids ?

[Francis]

OK so I have done this before and why do it again you ask..

Well did you see this new research ?

MONDAY, April 12 (HealthDay News) --Spanking children when they're 3 seems to lead to more aggressive behavior when they're 5, even if you take into account the child's initial level of aggression.

In other words, the old "I'll-give-you-something-to-cry-about" approach appears to backfire, new research suggests.

"We all know that children need guidance and discipline, but parents should focus on positive, non-physical forms of discipline, such as time-outs, and avoid spanking," said study author Catherine Taylor, an assistant professor of community health sciences at Tulane University's School of Public Health and Tropical Medicine in New Orleans.

Corporal punishment, of which spanking is a relatively minor form, can have larger implications as well, according to experts.

"The article emphasizes how critical effective positive parenting is in breaking the cycle of violence and the potential to reduce overall levels of violence in our society," said Dr. Kathryn J. Kotrla, chairwoman of psychiatry and behavioral science at the College of Medicine, Texas A&M Health Science Center Round Rock campus.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/hsn/20100412/hl_hsn/spankingmaymakeachildmoreaggressive

Now you might want to say different, but before you do, you may want to see what you said before..

http://www.offtopicz.net/showthread.php?t=56807

INTERESTING YOU SAY... :clap:clap

Cheers

 

[AnitaBeer]

Spankings seemed to do wonders for generations before the kids today.

 

[Bubblez]

I think spanking kids isn't a great idea, but if needed from time to time, it's alright. I think once a kid is about 9, they are getting too old for it. My mom used to spank me even when I was like 12, and I just felt that wasn't right.

Basically, it should be for very rare cases, and not doing it at all in my opinion is best.

 

[Francis]

Spankings seemed to do wonders for generations before the kids today.

Sure it did.. But having raised two without spanking and making parents closer to their kids can only be a bonus. I wish my mother and father had taken time to understand what was happening when I was a kid instead of throwing a whack and sending me to my room never knowing what the problem was. :willy_nilly:

A tantrum / problem is a sign of a greater issue..

I think spanking kids isn't a great idea, but if needed from time to time, it's alright. I think once a kid is about 9, they are getting too old for it. My mom used to spank me even when I was like 12, and I just felt that wasn't right.

Basically, it should be for very rare cases, and not doing it at all in my opinion is best.

Why need be ?

Parents just don't want to be cleaver enough to deal with kids so they spank.. What can a 2, 3 or even 7 year old have as far as cunning or life skills that a 20 or 30 year old doesn't ?

Most 12 year olds are not spanked but beaten ( abused ) as they are way to old for spanking..

Consequences for your kids that are much more effective and easy to find but require you to think about them.. Most people don't know or understand their kids, so how can they apply effective consequences. You have to spend time with your kids early and often in life to know them. People want and pop out kids as toys then want to grow up perfect by themselves with no love or attention they themselves craved and missed as kids. What a vicious circle..

This is just my opinion..

 

[Nguyen]

Spankings seemed to do wonders for generations before the kids today.

I think it had to do more with the greater maturity and self-control of their parents, rather than corporal punishment. Easy-money policies and the usurpation of parenting functions by a mindless bureaucracy have warped adults into perpetual adolescents, who are barely able to manage their own lives much less their children's. Combine that with the fact that the aforementioned mindless bureaucracy is also in ownership of their children the majority of the time, it's no wonder kids these days are spazzy retards. Having above average intellectual capacities and self-drive basically gives education staff open-season on you, because their system was designed around inculcating the lowest-common-denominator who have been shucked off by their parents like misbehaving cattle.

I don't really care for corporal punishment (or punishment in general), but I do think you ought to 1) actually mind yourself and your children to exhibit responsibility and self-control and 2) hold yourself and others accountable for their actions and the consequences thereof.

 

[Azazel]

 

[Tim]

I don't really care for corporal punishment (or punishment in general), but I do think you ought to 1) actually mind yourself and your children to exhibit responsibility and self-control and 2) hold yourself and others accountable for their actions and the consequences thereof.

:homo:

I don't believe in corporal punishment, I think it's the easy way out from proper parenting. If you need to hit your child to get them to listen, then you aren't doing your job right. It takes a lot of work and attention to keep your children under control without having to yell or spank them. Time and time again I see the parents who spank and yell are the very ones that don't pay attention to their child, let them walk all over them or aren't consistent at all in their discipline. Your child's behavior is a direct reflection on how you did your job as a parent....
I'm sure that my beliefs will piss some people off, but I wanted to throw out my true feelings on it without the sugar coating.

I apologize if this offended any of you.

 

[Nguyen]

I don't believe in corporal punishment, I think it's the easy way out from proper parenting. If you need to hit your child to get them to listen, then you aren't doing your job right. It takes a lot of work and attention to keep your children under control without having to yell or spank them. Time and time again I see the parents who spank and yell are the very ones that don't pay attention to their child, let them walk all over them or aren't consistent at all in their discipline. Your child's behavior is a direct reflection on how you did your job as a parent....

I agree. My parents never had to use physical discipline when dealing with me. Granted, I'm a spoiled pot-head and the envy of my older siblings, but I think I've turned out relatively well.

 

[Zorak]

Spankings wrong if you ask me.

What purpose is there to it, but to humiliate the child?

 

[Alien Allen]

A single swat on the butt is no big deal

If you go beyond that then there is a problem

I got it a couple of times and it did have an effect as a kid. So did the threat of a paddle at grade school.

Tim I don't dispute what you are saying but most of the people that are against spanking like you are do not do a remotely decent job of dealing with their kids as you speak of. Kids now a days are spoiled little brats for the most part.

I blame it on the I, Me, Mine generation of the 60's. It created a society of no responsibility

 

[Nguyen]

I blame it on the I, Me, Mine generation of the 60's. It created a society of no responsibility

To an extent I agree with what you are saying, but not necessarily the words you use to describe it. The 60s was essentially the decade of Maoism (grass-roots democratic radicalism). What it created was precisely the opposite of a 'me' culture. Those of us who are really self-centered (as I proudly am) are also self-responsible. It is those people who believe it is other people's responsibility to provide their happiness (the emotional collectivists, you might say) who made up that era.

 

[Peter Parka]

I believe in spanking and discipline as long as its not done in an angry, uncontrolled manner . Parents not disciplining their children properly and over the top laws designed to protect children is the reason there are so many little shits running around vandalising, stealing and mugging people. They know no one can touch them so they fear nothing. Spanking teaches kids that for every action there is a reaction. Its teaching them how to behave as an adult. If a child of mine was to be rude to me, I'd give them a smack, it will soon teach them to be respectful. Better a short, sharp shock than them growing up without respect, going into a pub as an adult and getting the living shit beaten out of them for being rude to someone.

 

[pinkporridge]

my parents spanked me when i was little. they didnt do it often and was mostly when my brother and i were fighting.. i have never had any anger issues as a result of it

 

[Tim]

Tim I don't dispute what you are saying but most of the people that are against spanking like you are do not do a remotely decent job of dealing with their kids as you speak of. Kids now a days are spoiled little brats for the most part.

If the parents aren't doing a good job, then it doesn't matter if they yell, spank or are completely oblivious and don't do anything. Their kids will misbehave regardless.
It's all about consistency and follow through. If you are very attentive and spank your child every time they get into trouble, then they will most likely listen. But if you aren't consistent and spank occasionally then your child will most likely test you every chance they get, and you will have a brat on your hands. So I am a firm believer that the consistency part is the key. If you are vigilant about being consistent with your child's behavior, then you shouldn't need to spank. IMHO

Don't think for a moment that I think I'm a perfect parent... I'm not as consistent as I would like, but it's what I strive for. I raise my voice on occasion because I loose my cool, but it seems that every time I do it's because I'm busy with something else and didn't have time for him... so who's problem is it really in that case?

I believe in spanking and discipline as long as its not done in an angry, uncontrolled manner . Parents not disciplining their children properly and over the top laws designed to protect children is the reason there are so many little shits running around vandalising, stealing and mugging people. They know no one can touch them so they fear nothing. Spanking teaches kids that for every action there is a reaction. Its teaching them how to behave as an adult. If a child of mine was to be rude to me, I'd give them a smack, it will soon teach them to be respectful. Better a short, sharp shock than them growing up without respect, going into a pub as an adult and getting the living shit beaten out of them for being rude to someone.

It also teaches them that hitting is ok. It teaches them that hitting is a way to resolve a problem.

Spanking or not spanking isn't the problem with kids today. It's the lack of respect and discipline that they were taught. They were allowed to get away with bloody murder by parents that didn't invest in their proper upbringing.

Peter, I would love you to meet my children. You would see respectful kids that don't need to be yelled at every 5 minutes to behave. They say thank you and please, they don't speak disrespectfully to adults.
And this was because they were raised by parents that care... they never needed to be spanked.


So is it the lack of spanking with kids today, or is it the lack of parenting?

 

[Baxley]

Spanking on the ass in time builds added tissue on the ass which creates more resistance to disease. The improved, and almost superpowered tissue from the spanking also creates added comfort when sitting on seating aparatus of reduced surface area which would otherwise create uncomfortable sitting for people with more tender unslapped buttocks.

 

[Sneakiecat]

Peter, I would love you to meet my children. You would see respectful kids that don't need to be yelled at every 5 minutes to behave. They say thank you and please, they don't speak disrespectfully to adults.
And this was because they were raised by parents that care... they never needed to be spanked.

Funny, my siblings and I say please, thank you, yes/no m'am/sir, and are polite like you wouldn't believe (and Dominic's working on it). And *gasp* we were spanked, which in my family was a quick swat on the butt on reserved for the most dire offences. I resent the fact that imply that my parents (and Donnie and I) don't care based on the fact that we believe in spanking. Everything I do has Dominic's best interest in mind. And if I feel the need to spank him, I am doing it because I care. Not because I like to hit my child.

And on a side note, all four of my siblings and I were spanked and none of us ever hit in anger. None of us could remotely be considered aggressive. Dominic has been spanked and has never once hit, kicked, or bit in anger.

 

[Tim]

Me and my three brothers were raised in a house where spankings were common (spare the rod, spoil the child was firmly believed) and I'm not aggressive at all. That wasn't my point at all.

I knew my posts would probably offend because I'm sure that many disagree with my views, that wasn't my intent.

Maybe I can boil my beliefs down in a quick sentence to help clarify.

Spanking isn't the difference in whether a child is good or bad, it's the consistency in discipline received from the parents that makes the difference.

With that being said. As a parent I made the decision to live in a house without constant yelling and screaming at my kids (exactly what my brother went through with his kids) and without spanking.

 

[Peter Parka]

It also teaches them that hitting is ok. It teaches them that hitting is a way to resolve a problem.

There's a big difference between giving a child a spank on the behind and having a punch up. Oh and I was brought up being spanked and it didn't teach me that hitting was ok, nor did it teach anyone I know who were spanked that as a child.

 

[porterjack]

There's a big difference between giving a child a spank on the behind and having a punch up. Oh and I was brought up being spanked and it didn't teach me that hitting was ok, nor did it teach anyone I know who were spanked that as a child.

if you were spanked and you think spanking is OK ( within the limits that you prescribe) then of course you were taught it is OK

and granted there is a diff between a spank and a fist to the face, spanking is hitting, i take nothing away from your parents, nor mine as they did the same with me ( spanking ), i just believe we should, correction, I know we can do better as adults dealiing with kids

spanking should be the exclusive domain for mommy to punish daddy after the kids are in bed

 

[Peter Parka]

if you were spanked and you think spanking is OK ( within the limits that you prescribe) then of course you were taught it is OK

Yes, I do think spanking children is ok.:dunno