I'm A Celeb-Killer...

[dt3]

First, this happened:

Today at the grocery store, the clerk asked if I wanted to donate $1 to the Children's Miracle Network. I said no.

When I came home I told Amber that if they really wanted a miracle for children, they should take up a donation for castrating Michael Jackson. I'd give $5.

Then he died.

So just on the off chance that my jokes can kill celebrities, I'd like to change my joke into buying singing lessons for Dave Matthews.

RIP Dave. :fing27

Then, the other day, this happened:

Alpha Centuri
Lttle black dwarf stars are always causing trouble...

A little black dwarf star always causing trouble...

I believe you're thinking of Gary Coleman! :eek

And last night:
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainmen...critical-condition-fall-home/?test=latestnews

Gary Coleman is in Critical Condition! :willy_nilly: :willy_nilly: :willy_nilly:

WHY CAN'T I GET DAVE MATTHEWS????????

 

[sierrabravo]

I remember that! Dave Matthews is invincible!!

 

[Abcinthia]

Hmmm... Do you have the magic touch for normal people as well? Either way, I'm staying on your good side so you don't stay anything about me and I die afterwards :surrender

 

[dt3]

I don't have time for normal people, all my energy is focused on the evil spawn of Satan known as Dave Matthews

 

[pjbleek]

I don't have time for normal people, all my energy is focused on the evil spawn of Satan known as Dave Matthews

he'll be here next week sometime, can you throw jinxes then?

 

[Guyzerr]

I don't have time for normal people, all my energy is focused on the evil spawn of Satan known as Dave Matthews

So you've managed to wipe Celine Dion off the face of the earth I gather. :24:

 

[hart]

Hmmm, who do I want you to target....well I don't much like Roseann Barr, could u put a hit on her please? Oh I know, Britney Spears, you can eliminate her too please. And any tele evangilists are fair game as far as I'm concerned too.....

 

[AUFred]

He said he was tired of hearing about Haiti. I am sure this is not the solution he had on his mind.

 

[dt3]

Celine Dion and Dave Matthews are my white whales. Until I get them, all Celeb hits are off the table.

Afterwards, I'll take requests.

 

[Dana]

Wow... Coleman's in critical?


Whatchu talkin bout no Jesus?

 

[hart]

Okay DT Gary's dead, u work on your others so you can get to my list...okay?

 

[Sneakiecat]

Okay DT Gary's dead, u work on your others so you can get to my list...okay?

It appears to only work during May and June, so you might have to wait a few years.

 

[AUFred]

just wow

 

[hart]

It appears to only work during May and June, so you might have to wait a few years.

Well DT still has a few days of May and all of June so I think he should just get cracking!:mad

 

[Zorak]

Fuck me, I'm pooling what little resources I have to help end this Dave Matthews rat

 

[freakofnature]

I like the song Gravedigger. :unsure:

 

[itsmeJonB]

This proves gods existence

 

[Codrus]

Celine Dion and Dave Matthews are my white whales. Until I get them, all Celeb hits are off the table.

Afterwards, I'll take requests.

Celine and Dave are under the protection of my Cod-Like powers...until i deem other wise...your wishes of harm shall go unanswered :cool...i would suggest focusing on another celeb or two

 

[Guyzerr]

Gary Coleman died today. Did you kill him?

 

[Codrus]

coleman was an insect....a zit on the ass of life, any man that beats on women...napoleons complex or not...shall suffer